Existence
by a9N9n9Y
Summary: While Harry is relieved that he doesn't need to live with his relatives during the school year anymore, he is still oblivious to what Hogwarts could bring. The first thing that makes him realize this is his talk with the sorting hat.
1. Inceptum

**Existence**

**Chapter 1: Inceptum**

He stared out of the window, out at the trees, hills and lakes passing by. The sky was cloudless, and he guessed that he'd be able to see the stars tonight. He sighed. It all seemed like a dream that it was true that he was going to a boarding school, away from his relatives. Could he ever have wished for something better? However, he was still not sure about the whole magic thing. Apparantly, as the giant, Hagrid, had told him, he wasn't only a wizard but also the most famous wizard. He had defeated someone called Lord Voldemort as a baby, the same man who had only minutes earlier killed both his parents.

Harry had always been an abnormal boy with his scar and all, but most unusual had been his intelligence. No matter how much he had disliked doing it shortly after starting school he had hid the fact from his aunt and uncle that he was smarter than even most of the smartest pupils in the higher classes. But hey, it had saved him from being locked in his cupboard and from having to do even more chores than usual a few times, hadn't it? Again he sighed. He wondered if he could finally express his talents and gifts at this new school.

Witchcraft. Wizardry. What had Hagrid called the school? Hogwarts, school for Witchcraft and Wizardry. Yes, that was it. Harry had to say that the shopping street the giant had token him to to get his school equipment had seemed very convincing, and those people in the pub - what was it called again? - had seemed quite thrilled at getting to meet him. Also, the titles of his school books weren't normal - to Harry. History of Magic Volume I? Potions for Beginners? Transfiguration Made Easy? What else other than magic could they teach at Hogwarts? Furthermore why would he be required to have a wand which above all even seemed to work if he wasn't going to be taught spells and jinxes? Really, the only plausible answer to this was that it wasn't a hoax as he had first believed. But he had to say that when that giant had given his cousin a pig tail back at the cabin when he had found Dudley eating the birthday cake Hagrid had made for Harry, it had been hilarious.

Another sigh escaped his mouth. All this was too much for him. He believed in science, and magic clearly wasn't part of it. Would he have to give up his believes in the methodical study of part of the material world?

"No Mummy...."

Harry turned to look at the only other person in the compartment sleeping soundfully right next to the door. Redhead... Redhead... Redhead Ronald Weasley! That was that guys name.

"He sure has a big hunger," Harry sighed looking at all the sweet wrappers lying around them.

"No Mummy...." Ronald continued to sleeptalk. Then, quite loudly, he started to snore. Harry had to do his best trying not to make too much noise giggeling in order not to wake the other boy up. He stood up and opened his trunk, rummaging until he found a book. Might as well get a headstart, he decided. As he pulled his hand back out he looked at the title of the middle-sized, brown-covered book. The letters were written in black bold letters above the picture of a cauldron: Potions for Beginners.

"Chapter one," Harry murmured as he made himself comfortable in his seat, stretching his arm out to try and find some left over sweets. "This sounds interesting. Chapter 1: Ingredients used in Potions. What have we here? Asphodel, powdered root of... bezoar... monkshood... wolfbane... wormwood, infusion of..."

By the time Ronald woke up again Harry had finished reading chapter four. All this was just fascinating him more and more with every word he read.

"What time is it?" Ron yawned stretching himself.

Harry glanced at his watch, then took a surprised look at the sky outside. How the time had flown by! It was almost half past six.

The loudspeaker in the corridors crackled. "Half an hour until arrival in Hogsmead," a voice said. "Half an hour..."

"We better get our school uniform on," Harry said putting his book away.

Ron shrugged moving some sweet wrappers with his foot. "Isn't anything left? I'm hungry!"

"I do not think they're going to starve us at Hogwarts," Harry said annoyed. "I mean, Hagrid did talk about a feast if I remember correct." But Ronald didn't listen to him, he was stuffing Bertie Bott's Every Flavour Beans down his throat.

"I cannot wait to get to the castle!" Ronald exclaimed as he and Harry jumped off the train once it had arrived in the place called Hogsmead. Like instructed they had left their trunks and pets on the train. "I am _so_ hungry!"

"Hey, that's Hagrid over there!" Harry said pointing at a large figure swinging a lantern.

"First Year," the giant shouted. "First Year over 'ere!"

"That's us," Ron said. Harry rolled his eyes.

"Why do I even hang out with that guy?" Harry muttered as he made his way through the crowd.

"All of yous 'ere?" Hagrid asked smiling at Harry.

"Can't we get a move on fatso?" a blonde haired boy asked arrogantly while studying his fingernails.

"Don't -" Harry started angrily glaring at that boy, but Hagrid cut him off.

"'Tis okay, 'arry. 'Tis okay," the giant repeated turning around to lead the students away from the train station. "Yous will be going over the lake with boats," he explained to the few boys and girls directly around him. "Not only will it give yous the best first view of the castle - and I am speaking from experience - but it also gives the others more time to prepare."

"Prepare for what?" a bushy-haired girl questioned curiously.

"Oh, I've said too much, I've said too much!" Hagrid started whining. "Can't say no more, can't say no more!"

"Well, we'll surely find out soon enough," Harry said to the girl. "By the way, I'm Harry, and you?"

"Hermione," she replied smiling nervously. "Want to sit in the same boat?"

"Sure."

"Nevile here will be joining us of course," she said pulling a boy holding a toad between his hands next to her.

"O-okay," he stammered nearly tripping over a stone reaching up especially high from the uneven ground.

As the evening brise went through Harry's hair he inhaled the fresh air, looking up at the dark sky. He had been right. You could see every star clearly.

"Ain't it wonderful?" Hagrid sighed looking up too.

"Yeah, so romantic," Hermione whispered in awe.

"Well," the groundskeeper said pointing ahead. "There are the boats. Four students in every one! No pushing please!"

Harry shared a boat with Hermione, Neville and Ronald. He saw the impolite boy from earlier reluctantly sit down in one together with two fat boys as if he thought he was too good to travel in a boat.

"See that boy over there?" he whispered in Hermione's ear. "I wonder who he is. I mean, he obviously comes from a rich family."

"Certainly, you can see it instantly," Hermione agreed. She wrinkled her nose. "Wouldn't really surprise me if he would turn out to be gay."

Harry erupted in guffaw.

"G-gay? Are you serious?!"

The girl shrugged just as the wooden boats left shore. "Didn't you see how he was admiring his perfect fingernails trying to find an imperfect spot? Older girls do that, not guys."

"I thought he did that because he comes from a wealthy family meaning that he wants to look better than everyone else," Harry shrugged his shoulders.

"Could be," Hermione replied as if weighing which answer was more probable.

"Hey, what are you two whispering about?" Ronald moaned. "I want to hear too!"

"Maybe if you would open your ears," Harry hissed quietly and Hermione giggled. It made him happy to amuse her.

"Oh my god!" one of the girls in another boat exclaimed about quarter of an hour later pointing to something in the distance. "Look at _that_!"

Everyone turned to look at the school building, wondering if they were imagining it or not.

"Just like in a fairy tale," Hermione breathed not able to move her eyes away from the mind-blowing sight of the castle.

In his boat Hagrid smiled happily. Another year with the joy of being able to make children happy.

* * *

Harry took a long look at the woman in front of him. After having arrived at the other end of the lake Hagrid had brought the children up to the castle and into the building to where this person had been waiting for them.

"I am Professor McGonnagal," the woman said softly looking at every student. Then her voice tightened. "I will be teaching all of you transfiguration in whatever house you are in, and I do not tolerate misbehaviour of any kind. In a moment I will bring you to a room where you will have to wait for a couple of minutes." She glanced at Hagrid who was on his way outside. "Once again our groundskeeper has managed to bring the First Year students early." Professor McGonnagal turned on her heels and the others followed her silently not daring to even breath. Following a three-minute walk the teacher held open the door to a room.

"This is small," Ron complained as everyone had shuffled in. They just had enough space to step twice in any direction without bumping into each other.

"It smells in here," Harry heared that boy from earlier, the one Hermione suspected to be gay, say, seemingly disguested by the smell of sweat coming from everyone in the room.

"It's so dark," someone else voiced their thoughts. Harry knew that person was right. He could hardly mkae out the outlines of Hermione's body.

"For crying out loud," Hermione said pulling her wand out of her robe. She made a swift hand movement at the same time saying something that was utterly unfamiliar with Harry and an instant later the tip of her wand was glowing, illuminating the nearest six people around her.

"What the -" Harry gasped as he saw something coming out of the nearest wall. It was a silvery-white colour, flimmering in the light coming from Hermione's wand and only as the thing looked up did the girls and even some of the boys scream in fright, recognizing that creature to be a ghost.

No one had time to realize what was happening. One moment they were alone in the room, the next dozens of ghosts were swirling around them, making owl noises and screeching "BOOH!" over and over again. Almsot every person was intimidated by them.

As he felt someone grabbing his hand Harry looked around until he saw that blonde boy staring at him as if he was the grim reaper. He was whimpering, giving off the girliest scream Harry had ever heard as one of the ghosts touched his cheek. Then the boy let go off Harry's hand blushing deeply.

"Enough!" the strict voice of McGonnagal interrupted the ghosts' appearence. "You scared them enough!"

"I - I can't believe they let them do this," Hermione stammered both anxious and angrily as she left the room, holding on to Harry's wrist.

* * *

Albus Dumbledore smiled in a satisfied manner as he saw the faces of the new students as soon as they entered the Great Hall.

"Isn't it a beautiful sight?" he sighed.

"Not for eveyone," the man sitting next to him sneered.

"Ah, Severus, don't be so harsh. It is their first time. I clearly remember when you first -"

"Enough," Severus Snape snapped. His eyes wandered over the group of eleven-year-olds walking towards the Head Table. There was Draco, Vincent and Gregory. Then -Hm? James Potter? How could that be?

"Young Harry," Albus whispered.

Severus grunted in reply. Of course. Potter's son, he should have known.

While Minerva McGonnagal was explaining to the new students what would happen next, Flitwick turned to the headmaster.

"Albus, what is the maximum bet this year?"

Dumbledore looked at the boys and girls in front of the table, thinking. "150 galleon," he finally decided. Just then the first student was called.

"Granger, Hermione!" The girl stepped forward, sat down on the chair directly under Albus and then put the hat on.

"Ravenclaw," Flitwick muttered instantly. "50 galleon."

"Ravenclaw," Severus followed. "Ten galleon."

"Gryffindor, 100 galleon," the headmaster whispered receiving a surprised glance from his potion master.

"You sure?" Severus asked.

"Quite certain," Albus answered while the other teachers made their decisions.

"Gryffindor!" the sorting hat exclaimed.

All of the teachers continued to place a bet upon every student like they did each and every year. By the time they got to 'P' Albus was, like usual, the owner of the most money.

"Gryffindor, everything," he said as "Potter, Harry" was called. The other teachers did the same, knowing that Lily and James' son could only be in one house.

"Everything," Severus murmured so quiet no one heard it, "on Slytherin."

* * *

**Well, who do we have here?**

_What the -uh, I didn'tknow you could read minds. _Harry was quite shocked at hearing an unfamiliar voice in his head.

**How else did you think I was communicating with everyone, silly?**

_Dunno, I s'pose._

**Yes, of course you didn't Harry.**

_Hm? You know my name?_

**I can read minds, remember?**

_Oh, yeah._

**Shall we start then?**

_Uhm... I guess so._

**Your parents were both in Gryffindor?**

_I - I think Hagrid mentioned something like that, yeah._

**I do not think you should go there though.**

_Any reason not? And what other house would you send me to?_

**You are quite intelligent, a trait from Ravenclaw. Hufflepuff is nothing for no one like you.**

_So Ravenclaw it is then?_

**No Harry - I dare say I should send you to Slytherin.**

_Slytherin?! Isn't that the house where all the evil students go to?_

**Not evil students, Harry. Sly students, yes. Cunning students, yes. Ambitious students, yes. But no evil students.**

_Ohhh..._

**Be not discouraged. You cannot know if you did not learn. **

_Then - then it is Slytherin?_

**In the end it is more or less your decision. If you have anything else to say against Slytherin which you think is a good enough reason for me not to send you there, speak now or be silent forever.**

_Well, Slytherin it is then I think._

**You still sound a bit uncertain. Here at Hogwarts you are meant to feel at home and not as if you're in jail.**

_Yes, you are right. It's just that the only person who I think could be a friend was sorted into Gryffindor. Also, from all the kids who have already been sorted into Slytherin I don't really like any of them._

**It is understandable that you are reluctant Harry, but you should think of what would be best for yourself.**

_Yeah, you are right..._

**Harry, you're a bright boy. If you look deep inside you you will find the right answer.**

Harry closed his eyes and as soon as he did an image started to form in his mind. There was a majestic lion sleeping peacefully in the shadows of a tree cast by the midday sun. A snake crept up to him, silent as death. It bit the lion on the paw. Next thing the lion knew was that he was standing on his hind legs, fighting an invisible force. The snake started rising in the air; an instant later its head was at the same height as that of the lion. Finally, being able to see his enemy, the four-legged creature lunged forward but the reptile was faster. It flung itself around the other animal's neck, tightening its grip fast than a stone could fall down when thrown on the floor. As the snake slithered away the lifeless body of the lion lay in the shadows of the same tree where he had slept moments earlier.

_I think I know the answer._

**Yes, Harry?**

Harry took a deep breath before he answered. _Slytherin._


	2. Tumultus

**Existe****nce**

**Chapter 2: Tumultus**

"This can't be possible!" Minerva exclaimed looking at Albus who was sitting in his chair, his hands resting interlaced on the desk top in front of him. He looked at her over his half-moon glasses.

"I am sorry but the hat made his decision," he said softly after a pause.

"Where's Severus?" Flitwick inquired. "He must have had something to do with this! I mean, he is the only one who bet that Harry Potter would go to Slytherin. There _has _to be something foul about that!" All the other teachers murmured in agreement.

Albus glanced at the paper lying in front of him. Every year he magically transfigured a piece of parchment, a quill and an ink well so that they write down everyone's bets. That way it was fairer and no one could cheat.

"Or Severus messed with your charm," Madam Sprout piped up. "I mean, has anyone heard him place his bet on Harry?" Everyone shook their head.

"Well, we cannot come to a decision about this until Severus comes back," the headmaster sighed. Like every year Severus introduced the new students of his house to the others, at the same time telling them the house rules he had set up and threatening them with sever punishments if they should misbehave.

"How can it be?" Minerva picked the subject up again, this time talking to herself. "Harry _cannot _possibly belong to Slytherin. All his ancestors were in Gryffindor so surely he too has a place in my house!"

Albus looked over at the sorting hat who was on a shelf two meters away from the desk.

"If only you could talk to explain your decision," he sighed. A moment later the hat lifted its top and opened its mouth, smiling.

"A truth spoken before its time is dangerous," the hat chuckled.

"What?!" Madam Pomfrey, the school nurse, asked irritated.

"Day to day nothing seems to change, but pretty soon everything's different."

"Could you please stop talking in riddles?" Sprout questioned puzzled.

"Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored," the sorting hat muttered before going back into its motionless position.

"Albus do you know what he meant?"

* * *

As Severus walked along the corridors towards the headmaster'f office he attempted to answer some of the questions which were swirling around his mind. _Why had the hat put Harry Potter into Slytherin?_ Better leave that one for later, he decided. _Why had he ever thought that Potter would end up in his house? _Uh... _Had he been the only one thinking Potter wouldn't end up in Gryffindor?_ Well, he was about to find out.

He took a look at the gargoyle protecting the entrance to Dumbledore's office. "Bounty," he muttered taking three stairs at a time as soon as he had slipped by the gargoyle which had magically moved to the side.

"Ah, Severus," Albus greeted him as soon as he entered the office. "We have been waiting for you."

"I guessed so much, Headmaster," Severus muttered. "How much money do you all owe me?"

Albus picked the betting sheet up. "Harry P. - Bets: Eighteen. Ravenclaw: None. Hufflepuff: None. Gryffindor: 17. Slytherin: 1."

Severus raised his eyebrows. "You all owe me a hundred and fifty galleons each?"

"Here," Dumbledore said tossing a middle-sized bag towards him. "150 galleons."

"What did you do?" Minerva asked furiously glaring at Severus.

"What do you mean?"

"It was clear that Harry would go to Gryffindor," Filius explained.

"Didn't the hat say that "A truth spoken before its time is dangerous"? We should wait and see what time brings. A muggle once said "Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards". For all we know one day in the future we might suddenly understand the hat's reasoning. I think that we should see how things are going and pick up on this at a later date. Anyone disagrees?"

Everyone shook their head.

* * *

The next morning Harry woke up while it was still dark. Yesterday he had been too tired to look around the dorm carefully, but now he did. There were four other boys sleeping soundfully around him. His four-poster bed was just beneath a small window near the bathroom door. Once he stood up on the bed he could make out the lake water occassionally splashing against the glass as the waves moved back and forth.

Slowly he got off the bed, not making a single noise. He crept to the bathroom and opened the door just wide enough to slip in. The light turned on automatically. On his left were three sinks, behind them two toilet cubicles and on his right five showers.

Once he had exited the bathroom he went back to his bed, opened his trunk and pulled a tracksuit trouser and a jumper out along with his potion book. He slipped them on over his pyjama and went out of the dorm. After closing the heavy wooden door behind him he waited for his eyes to adjust to the darkness, then Harry walked forwards until he came to a flight of steps. He counted them.

"...eleven, twelve," Harry whispered as he reached the ground. He looked around, finding himself in a large room. On his right was a fireplace and armchairs were placed around it. There were still a couple of small flames flickering. In the dim light Harry was able to see that the wallpapers of what he assumed the commonroom was were green with the occasional snake on it.

As Harry moved towards the armchairs he stood still scared to death as he could suddenly see the shadow of a figure. It turned to face him.

"Potter?" a voice asked, surprised. "What are you doing here?"

It took Harry a moment to place the voice as the one of his Head of House.

"I - I woke up and couldn't go back to sleep anymore, sir," he managed to say hoping that he wouldn't get into trouble.

"Why don't you come and sit here? Why, you must be freezing!" Harry saw Professor Snape raise his wand and a second later the flames were back to life.

"What - what are you doing here sir - if I may ask?" Harry asked stiffly sitting down in an armchair oppsosite his Head of House.

"I sometimes come here when I can't sleep," Snape admitted. He sighed. "I too had been in Slytherin. All this just brings back memories, Potter." He looked up. "What book do you have there?"

"My potion book," the boy replied still a bit uneasy.

"Good choice." Snape half smiled and sighed again. "You know, everyone is surprised that you came into my house."

"Because everyone in my family has been a Gryffindor?"

"Yes. Yes that's correct. All the teachers are baffled by the hat's decision. However, this is not the first time that the sorting hat made such a decision." The potion master's face turned grim and he stared into the fire. "Once before he placed a boy whose family had always been in Slytherin into Gryffindor."

"Do you know who that boy was?" Harry dared to ask.

"A good friend of your fathers, so much will I tell you. But do not ask any further, that boy nearly brought me death. Well, I should be going now." Snape stood up. "And Potter?"

"Yes, sir?"

"Don't let me catch you up so early again otherwise I will have to give you detention."

"Yes, sir. Of course, sir."

The moment Harry heard nothing but silent he sank back into the armchair, relieved. If he thought about it his Head of Hous was actually quite nice.

* * *

"How long have you been awake?" the blonde boy from yesterday asked Harry watching him read a book on his bed.

"Quite some time," Harry replied looking up. "Uhm... I don't really know anyone here... what's your name?"

"I'm Draco Malfoy," the boy replied. "Call me Dragon if you want to. Correct me if I'm wrong but are you Harry Potter?"

Harry nodded.

Draco's face blanked. "Do not expect me or anyone else to treat you differently just because of that."

He shruggd. "I didn't even know anything about this whole world, and above all I'm not used to all the attention yet."

"Is that so?" Draco asked with raised eyebrows. He started to look around the room, noticing the small window right above Harry's bed.

"You know," Draco said pointing at the framed window, "Uncle Sevvie told me about that window. When he had gone here to Hogwarts he had that same bed you have. He told me that it's pretty good when you have trouble sleeping. I mean, he told me that the waves splashing against the glass is quite relaxing and makes you fall asleep sooner."

This time Harry raised his eyebrows. Hadn't Professor Snape mentioned something about having trouble sleeping?

Draco laughed. "Uncle Sevvie is Professor Snape. He is my godfather."

Harry watched Draco get out of bed.

"Already had a shower?"

"Uhhh..." Harry had to think about what Hermione had said about Malfoy being gay. "Yeah, I have, sorry. I can wait for you tomorrow if you want..."

"Uhm... okay then. Oh, and when the others wake up tell them not to enter the bathroom."

"What are their names?" Harry asked before Malfoy could close the door.

"The tanned one is Blaise, and the fat ones are called Goyle and Crab," Draco informed Harry.

"Fatty and Builder's Bum," Harry grinned as Goyle turned around in bed so that his duvet fell down on the floor, his trousers sliding down. Draco laughed loudly.

* * *

At breakfast Harry sat together with his dorm mates. Professor Snape came around to pass out their timetables soon after they had sat down at the Slytherin table.

"This is delicious," Harry smiled biting into some toast coated with numerous layers of chocolate cream. "I've never had such a good meal in my life!"

"Where did you live all this life?" Draco asked shocked. "I mean, having chocolate coated toast is what we all eat nearly every day! Or pancakes, oh they are _so_ good!" Fatty and Builder's Bum nodded in agreement while stuffing down fried egg.

Harry shrugged almost saddened. "I made them lots of times for my whale cousin, but Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon never allowed me to eat one or even taste it."

"Oh my god," Draco exclaimed. "Harry, here at Hogwarts they serve some of the finest foods in the whole world! Within the next month we will all make sure that you tried everything, won't we guys?"

"Yeah," Blaise muttered.

"What's the matter?" Malfoy inquired while making himself a jam covered toast.

Blaise glanced at Harry shoveling egg on his plate. "He is meant to be a Gryffindor, you know that very well," he grunted.

Draco glared at him. "Of course I do, but the hat sorted him into our house so he is one of us. Got it? Didn't Unc- I mean Professor Snape tell us yesterday evening that unlike all the other houses we have to act like one big family? That we have to look out for one another? How can we do that if we don't accept everyone as a family member Blaise?"

"Dunno, but I still don't like him. I mean, after all he is still James Potter's son."

"Aw, come on now! No one says that Harry will step into his father's footsteps! I mean, how could he if he doesn't even know anything about him? As long as we manage to keep him away from his family history he'll grow up to be a perfect Slytherin," Draco promised just as Professor Snape gave him his timetable.

"Yes!" Harry smiled after receiving his. "We've got potions first!"

"Harry," Draco said turning to face him. He gave Blaise a last glare before continuing to talk with Harry. "Remember when the headmaster explained the point system? You seem to be bright enough, so do your best to show off a little in class and try to earn as many points as you can. Everyone will be thankful for it."

"Alright, I'll see what I can do," Harry said.

A mere half an hour later the Gryffindor and Slytherin First Year students sat in the potion class room, some listening intensely to what Snape said and also taking notes, some giving their teacher half of their ear and some just sleeping.

"So, Potter, let us see if fame is everything you need," Snape said grinning in an unsetteling way once he finished his opening speech. He looked at the boy. "Where can you find a bezoar and what does it do?"

"It's a stone found in the stomach of a goat, sir. It can save you from most poisons."

"The difference between monkshood and wolfsbane?"

"There is none sir, they are both the same plant, also known by aconite."

"You seem to have prepared yourself very well," the potion master acknowledged trying not to show his happiness that at least one student was able to prepare themselves for their lesson. "10 points for Slytherin. Weasley: what happens when you add an infusion of wormwood with powdered root asphodel?"

"Huh? What?" Ron asked sleepily looking up.

"Tut tut - 15 points from Gryffindor for sleeping in the classroom. Is here anyone who didn't sleep and who can tell me the answer to my question?"

"A sleeping potion so powerful it is also known as the Draught of the Living Dead," Harry blurted out. Snape turned on his heel and glared at him.

"Potter, since when do you yell out in class? But yes, your answer was correct. A further five points to Slytherin."

"That's not fair!" Hermione said angrily standing up. "If we Gryffindors had called out the answer without having been asked to you would have taken away points and ignored the fact that we answered a question correct. But when someone from your house called out you did the complete opposite!"

Snape looked at her for a second before walking briskly over to her desk and staring her down. "When Ms. Granger," he whispered gloomily, "have you been told that life is ever fair?"

Hermione looked away embarrassed and sat down again.

"Just as I thought," Snape said walking back to the front of the classroom. "Read chapter one in your books and write a foot-long essay on the different ingredients. If you haven't finished by the end of the lesson you will have to do it as extra homework."

At the end of the lesson Slytherin was awarded with a further twenty points for not only being the only one to complete the essay but also for being the only one to have started on it.

"Man," Draco said cheerfully as they exited the classroom. "35 points in one lesson! This goes better than I thought."

Harry grunted in reply as they walked up the stairs leading down to the dungeons. Hermione stormed by him.

"Hermione!" he called out. He knew that she was angry at him for not saying anything to defend her in front of Snape.

"Forget her," Draco adviced as they turned to go up the main staircase. "You have us now, you don't need her."

"I guess so," Harry sighed.

Second they had transfiguration. Soon they noticed that Snape wasn't the only one favouring his house. McGonnagal too gave Gryffindor more points than Slytherin, even taking away points when Harry managed to make the needle he had made from the match he had given into a bunch of flowers.

"This is not what I had asked you to do," Professor McGonnagal said snatching the flowers away. "Five points from Slytherin."

"What the hell?" Draco exclaimed. "You should give him points for having mastered another transfiguration rather than take away points!"

"Malfoy," the head of Gryffindor tutted. "Do you fancy detention in any way? I can give you a life's supply of it."

"No, Professor." As soon as she turned away he muttered, "Bitch."

"Calm down," Harry sighed transforming yet another match. "She treats Gryffindor better because Snape is so mean to Gryffindor, but in the end he is only doing it because she is not fair to his house so I suppose it works out in a way."

"Look at her," Malfoy tried again. "She is even awarding points to Longbottom for only trying! I wouldn't even classify that as unfair, it is far worse!"

Harry sighed again. "I do guess we will have to live with this for anotehr seven years my friend."


	3. Iudicium

**Existe****nce**

**Chapter 3: Iudicium**

The Slytherins and Gryffindors had their first DADA lesson on Thursday. Draco and Harry sat in the front row. After Professor Quirrell had called the rollcall he, like Professor Snape, gave an opening speech describing what he would teach the students in the following months. Then they started to read the first chapter in their books. As Harry had already read chapters one to three the night before he was extremely bored.

**There is yet a lot you have to learn. If you want it I will help you discover which path is the right one to take.**

"What?" Harry asked irritated.

"Is something the matter?" Quirrel questioned him.

"Uh - no sir," Harry answered scratchinghis head. What had just happened?

**I am sure you still remember me, Harry. **The voice chuckled.

_What the_- Harry thought back taking a second to realize that he was talking, or rather thinking, to the sorting hat.

**First of all I have to warn you. There is someone in this castle -**

"Ouch," Harry whispered grimacing in pain as his scar started to hurt from one moment to the next.

"You alright?" Draco asked worriedly. Harry nodded, a second later getting another pain spasm.

- **danger to you -**

Harry couldn't think straight. He got one pain spasm after another while the hat was trying to tell himsomething. His glasses fell off.

"Sir!" he heard Draco yell. He saw a blurry figure turn around; Quirrel had been writing on the chalkboard. "Sir! Harry needs to go to the nurse!"

-** mort - **

Harry couldn't see anything anymore, just felt someone grabbing him by the shoulder and trying to pull him up. Once he stood on his legs they gave away beneath him and he fell to the floor midway hitting his forehead on the edge of the table.

**- meditation...**

* * *

When he awoke Harry found himself in a room he had never been to before. It was all blurry; he didn't have his glasses on.

"Here," a voice said placing something in his hands. He could feel the round frame of his spectacles. He put them on, recognizing the person looking at him to be Professor Snape who sat on a chair next to the bed.

"Professor..."

"Do you have any idea what caused you to have those spasms?" Snape asked instantly.

Harry thought for a moment, looking around. There were about twenty empty beds put out systematically. He was lying in one next to one of the three big windows. At the other end of the room there were two doors.

"My scar started to hurt," Harry whispered staring at the duvet with dead eyes. "I don't know why though."

"Your scar?! Has it hurt before?"

Harry shook his head looking at the professor. "No, sir. This is the first time ever."

"Could there be any other cause?" Severus asked curiously.

The boy opened his mouth to tell his Head of House about the hat talking to him in his mind, but then he thought it'd be better if he kept it a secret.

He shook his head in reply. "No sir, not anything I can think of."

"Very well," Snape said standing up. "I expect Draco will be coming to visit you soon enough."

The same evening - Harry had meanwhile met and talked shortly with Madam Pomfrey - Draco came to inquire how Harry was.

"You gave us all a fright," he said to Potter. "I mean, it was pretty scary when you fainted. By the way, we have our first flying lesson next week."

"Did we get any homework?" Harry asked curiously. "Madam Pomfrey said I only have a light concussion and should be able to leave by tomorrow."

Draco laughed. "Quirrel wants us to write a two-foot long essay on what we covered in today's lesson. I can give you all the notes I copied from Blaise. Then Flitwick wants us to practice the spell we learned. For History of Magic I don't have any idea what we need to do - I spent the whole lesson here with you and no one I know took notes."

"Hermione sure did," Harry suggested.

"Granger?" Draco asked in disgust. "Just as if I'm going to ask a Gryffindor for help!"

"Anything else?" Harry changed the subject.

"Well, we had potions last. Uncle Sevvie was here with you waiting for you to wake up so the old man covered the lesson. We didn't follow any of the instructions Uncle Sevvie had left him but told us one boring story after another, awarding Gryffindor twenty points for being the only ones still awake by the end. However, you can ask Professor Snape for our homework. He'll sure give us points if we're the only ones who do it." Draco looked at Madam Pomfrey coming over to them. "I better get going, see you tomorrow!" he yelled as he ran out again.

Harry sank back in the pillows. It was a good feeling to know that he not only had a good friend but also people who cared about him. He had never felt so happy.

* * *

Something was up, Severus knew it. But what? Harry's scar had never hurt before, so why had it today? He decided to pay his friend Lucius Malfoy a visit in the next couple of days.

* * *

After the first week was over most students had gotten used to Hogwarts. As the first flying lesson arrived the new students got more and more restless, and their teachers more and more annoyed. However, as Harry was the only calm person in all of his classes even McGonnagal had to give him a couple of points. In other lessons Slytherin profited even more; Harry was the only person other than Hermione who managed to master all the spells and jinxes they learned, but on the other hand he was always faster and his homework was always better. Soon Harry was the favourite friend of most of his fellow house members and even Snape was even nicer to him every once in a while.

"I can't wait!" Draco said on the day they would have the flying lesson at breakfast.

"Get over it," Harry said eating pancakes while reading _The Easy Guide to Meditation _which he had gotten from the library. The only thing he remembered the hat telling him was the word meditation, so he guessed that he was expected to learn how to be able to meditate if he wanted he hat's help.

"Aren't you excited?" Draco asked surprised while drinking pumpkin juice. "I mean, you have never even sat on a broom have you?"

Harry shook his head. "But I've handled them often enough. I think it was a bit too much to hope to never have to see one again."

Draco gave him an irritated look.

"It's not important," Harry waved the matter off closing the book. He ate the last piece of pancake. "If I'm correct we have potions now."

"And we're brewing our first potion," Draco suddenly grinned. "Snape is sure to give you lots of points."

Harry sighed. "I just hope my ducking reflexes are still good."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"Nothing Draco, I'm just saying that probably half the people are going to blow their cauldron up."

Malfoy gave him an odd glance. _I think it was a bit too much to hope to never have to see one again. I just hope my ducking reflexes are still good._ What the _hell _had been going through Harry's mind when he had said those things?

* * *

"... and take good caution of the instructions in your books," Snape ended his warnings. "If you don't you will mess it up and might even make your cauldron explode which could have serious conequences."

As soon as he stopped speaking everyone started to stumble about trying to find all the ingredients they needed. A couple of minutes later the students started boiling the water in their cauldrons.

Harry took a good look at the instructions in his book, wrinkling his eye in disbelieve. Sure, the Boil Cure Potion was easy but it could be made even better if some of the instructions were changed. Instead of following the instructions as they were written down Harry decided to let it simmer for a little bit longer at the end, waiting for it to turn pink.

Most of the students ended up with boils all over their bodies because they messed the potion up, and Snape took away 10 points from every person who screwed up. While Slytherin suffered from a minor injury of thirty points Gryffindor had to cope with one hundred points. Hermione received a mere five points for her potion.

"Why only five sir?" she questioned. "I followed the instructions closely and produced a perfect potion!"

Snape looked at her with raised eyebrows. "Perfect you say? Take a look at Potter's potion."

"It's pink when it's meant to be red," Hermione observed coldly.

"Yes," the potion master agreed. "It is pink. An advanced result, Miss Granger. Potter, thirty points for Slytherin."

"Yes," Draco muttered happily high-fiving Harry. "Thanks for making up the points Goyle, Crab and Millicent lost for screwing up."

"That's what I'm here for, isn't it?"

* * *

Everyone was glad when the flying lesson finally started. It was held outside on the school grounds. Madam Hooch, the flying instructor, gave a short introduction speech and then told the students to try and get their brooms to obey them.

"Stretch your arm out and place your palm downside," the teacher said demonstrating it at the same time. "Then call "Up!" and the broom should come up into your hand." Like she had said her broom shot up and she grabbed it.

"Up!" the students started to yell. Harry, Draco and Seamus Finnigan were the first ones to succeed, and for once Hermione helplessly failed.

It took some time before everyone got their broom.

"Hold your broom in your hands so that its end is resting on the grass," Madam Hooch yelled. "Then step over it with one foot so that you are standing above it. When I blow my whistle I want you all to push yourselves off the ground! Three, two-"

"Uhaaaaaaa!" Longbottom suddenly exclaimed as he pushed himself off too early. His broom gained height faster than he could yell.

"Longbottom!" Hooch called out irritated. "Come back down!"

"I - I can't!" Neville yelled frightened. He tried to hold on to the broom as best as he could but his sweaty fingers started slipping. "I CAN'T!"

The broom seemed to have a mind of its own. It did a few saltos - luckily Neville didn't fell off - and then made its way over the lower roof of the castle. Just as Hooch mounted her broom to get to his help the broom did anotehr salto and finally Longbottom couldn't hold on anymore. His cloak got caught on the roof tiles, and it slowly ripped. It was fortunate for him as the few seconds he spent hanging there damped his fall.

"Ouch," he whimpered shortly after he had reached the ground. "OUCH!"

"Don't move a muscle while I'm gone to bring Longbottom to the school healer," Hooch instructed helping Neville up. Seconds later she was out of sight.

Draco walked over to the spot where Neville had landed as he saw something glistening in the sun.

"What you got there?" Harry asked curiously coming over. All the others joined them.

"That's Neville's Remembrall!" Ronald exclaimed. "He got it this morning from his aunt." He stretched his hand out. "Give it back," Weasley demanded.

"Make me," Malfoy yelled mounting his broom and hoovering a metre above the others only a moment later.

"Wow," Harry whispered gobsmacked. For the first time he wanted to fly through the air, to feel the wind ruffle up his hair, to soar into heaven and back.

The Gryffindors tried to hold Ronald back but he wouldn't listen.

"Come on Harry!" Draco called. Spontaneosly Harry joined the other two. At first he was shaky, nearly losing his balance.

"Catch!" Malfoy threw the ball over Ron and Harry had to race after it to make sure that he really caught it. At the same time he had to try and stay on the broom.

_Shit, shit, shit!_ he thought as he saw the glass ball go in the direction of one of the windows. Luckily he just reached it in time to prevent both the ball and himself crashing into the framed glass. He didn't see the shocked face of the Head of Gryffindor staring at him from within.

Following his graceful landing and warm welcome from the Slytherins he saw McGonnagal stride over to him, steaming with anger. Pulling him by the ear she led him to the headmaster's office. During their walk there she kept repeated about in how much trouble he was in.

They passed the gargoyle after she yelled the password at it, then pulled him even firmer up the stairs. Without knocking she stormed into Dumbldore's office.

"What the-" Snape said turning to look at them. He was standing in front of Dumbledore's desk.

"Oh," McGonnagal managed to say blushing deeply. "Am I disturbing you two?"

Snape stared at Harry. "What did he do?" he asked calmly yet scarily.

"Well," the Head of Gryffindor started. "He was flying without permission."

The headmaster nodded.

"And he nearly crashed into my office," McGonnagal continued. "While attempting to catch a ball of some sort."

"Did he succeed?" Snape asked his features calming down slightly.

Everyone looked at Harry.

"Uh, yes sir," he replied opening his palm to reveal the still ubroken remembrall. His Head of House's eyebrows raised with interest.

"What kind of punishment do you feel is appropriate?" Professor McGonnagal questioned Dumbledore.

"I would suggest you let go off his ear first of all," Snape answered coolly. "Then I might suggest that he tries out for the Quidditch team."

"The what?!" McGonnagal exclaimed in disbelieve. "He broke the rules and you want to award him for it?"

Professor Snape looked at her in surprise. "I do certainly believe you would do the same thing, especially as Gryffindor too needs a seeker just like Slytherin."

McGonnagal started opening and closing her mouth like a goldfish. "I - well..."

Albus looked at both of them. "Is there anything else about this subject either of you want to say?"

Snape shook his head and McGonnagal was still searching for the right thing to say.

"If we may be excused?" the potion master asked putting his hand on Harry's shoulder. The headmaster gestured them to leave.

The two left the office and were soon on their way to the dungeons. Neither of them had said anything.

"Does your ear hurt?" Severus finally asked.

"A bit," Harry replied touching it. As he withdrew his hand he stared at it. "_Crap_."

Snape sighed. "Minerva has always had a strong grip." He took his wand and touched the wound with it, muttering a spell. "A simple healing spell," he explained. "It lets the wound heal faster than it naturally would."

"Thanks."

"Don't mention it," Snape replied continuing to walk on. There was another awkward silence. Again he broke it. "Have you ever even heard of Quidditch before?"

"No," Harry admitted. "But I guess it has to do with flying and someone catching a ball."

"Yeah, it does. I'll get Flint to explain it to you. He's the Slytherin Quidditch Captain and he'll see if you have the talent to make the team."

Harry looked at his Head of House.

"Did the sorting hat ever speak to you again after it sorted you into Slytherin, sir?" he blurted out.

Severus gave him an odd look. "No. Why are you asking, Potter? Did he talk to you?"

Harry shook his head. He wasn't even sure if it had been the hat or just his imagination. "No, sir."

They reached the place where, if you said the correct password, a space in the wall opened giving the entry to the Slytherin common room out.

"And Potter?"

"Yes, sir?"

"If you should get a headache again in class, come to me instantly. Understood?"

Harry nodded absentmindedly, already engaged in a conversation with Draco.


	4. Percussum Novus

****

**Existe****nce**

At first everyone was a bit skeptical about Harry's flying and catching skills, but after Markus Flint tested him in every possible way he declared that Harry was in the team. McGonnagal was so outraged at that that she took away points from Slytherin at every chance she got. Snape on the other hand balanced it out, giving Slytherin even more points than before. At the same time he also became more and more surprised at Harry's talent at brewing potions. He always seemed to find one way or another to change the instruction list to perfect the potions.

It took Harry a whole week to be able to meditate at the best of his ability after finish reading the book. Every evening he would sit on his bed and practice. When he was ready the hat would get in contact with him.

****

You are a fast learner I have to say.

Well, everyone is asleep so it is quite easy to concentrate on nothing and let my body go.

**I am sorry about the last time. I should have broken contact with you when I first noticed your symptoms of pain.**

__

It's okay, really.

**Let us begin then. Every month I will ask you a question or tell you something and I want you to think carefully about it. You have a full month to think about your answer, and the next time I contact you you tell me what you found.**

__

I do not see how that is going to help me though.

**Harry, finding the right path to follow is not easy. I will try and help you realize certain things with the questions I will give you. In the end you have to take all your knowledge, all the information you gathere, and decide on your own. You will have different choices you could make, and it will be up to you to choose the correct one.**

__

Oh, okay. I think I understand now.

**Then here we go: Why do people wear masks at the carnival?**

* * *

Chapter 4: Percussum Novus

Chapter 4: Percutio Novus

**Chapter 4: Atrox Novus**

"_Potter!_"

Huh? - Yeah, Professor McGonnagal?" Harry asked breaking away from his thoughts. He was in transfiguration. Everyone around him was changing a flower into a mouse.

"Potter, since when do you daydream in class?" Professor Mcgonnagal yelled furiously. Most of the Gryffindors were giggeling behind her.

Harry gave her an innocent look. "Ever since daydreaming and school were invented, miss?"

McGonnagal's face went red. "I do not need your smart comments, Potter. Detention at eight."

The teacher raised her eyebrows. "Do I care? Malfoy, 10 points from Slytherin for attempting to tell me what I have to do."

Once the bell rang everyone left the classroom and made their way to their DADA lesson. All the Slytherins were in an extremely bad mood.

"I'm sorry," Harry sighed.

"Not your fault she's a bitch is it?" Draco tried to cheer him up as they entered their next classroom. Quirrel was already at his desk waiting for everyone to give their homework in.

About ten minutes into the lesson Quirrel started writing on the board again. Harry looked up to copy what his teacher was writing. Absentmindedly he started scratching his scar. The more often and longer he looked up the worse it became.

"You alright?" Draco whispered.

Harry nodded. He looked up again. A sudden lighting bolt seemed to go through his whole body as his eyes set on the back of Quirrel's turban; he fell off his chair.

Images started flashing before his eyes. A man wearing glasses. A red-haired woman. Screams. A baby -

Before anyone could react Harry scrambled up and stumbled out of the classroom. He'd remembered what Snape had told him, that he should go and see him immediatly when his scar hurt again. He fell a couple of times, still frightened by what had just happened.

Finally he reached the dungeons, out of breath. Only now he realised that his glasses had fallen off in the DADA classroom. He took a moment to catch his breath. Then continued to the potion classroom.

* * *

"What the -" Severus said looking up as Harry pressed the door open and came in, falling onto his knees and hands. Severus stood up and went to help Potter up.

"What on earth happened?" he questioned the boy. "Where are your glasses?"

"DADA classroom," Harry said slowly sitting down on one of the chairs. "My - my scar started itching, and then suddenly pictures started flashing before my eyes -"

"What pictures?" the potion master asked hurriedly. "What did you see?"

"There, there was a man, not too old. He was wearing glasses," Potter replied instantly trying to remember. "And a woman. Yes, there was a woman! She had red hair, was a bit pale too."

Whatever colour Severus had in his face drained as he listened to the boy's words.

"There was also a baby!" Harry recalled. "He looked a bit like the man if I think about it..."

"Harry," Severus said grabbing the boy by his shoulders. "Listen to me carefully. In a moment I will bring you to my quarters where you will rest and then I will bring you to a friend of mine. He might be able to help us out."

"Okay," Harry muttered starting to feel tired. He didn't take in that his Head of House had just called him by his first name.

First Severus helped Potter up, but seeing how sleepy the boy was he decided to carry him instead. It surprised him that Harry was so light. He had expected him to weigh a lot more.

* * *

"Who is that friend?" Harry questioned Snape after he had come to wake him up and given him the glasses he had retrieved from Draco who had picked them up.

"Draco's father. We both have to give you a lot of information, so it's good that you have rested and are fully awake. Come on." His Head of House left the room.

Harry looked around. He found himself in a bed with black bed covers, duvet and pillows. The walls and ceiling were in emerald green, and the floor was parquet. There were a couple of bookshelves crammed full with books of all sizes. He went after Snape.

The room he came into had a fireplace, two sofas and a coffee table. The living room. The Head of Slytherin stood in front of the fireplace.

"There you are," Severus said. "You have never travelled with floo powder have you?"

Harry shook his head.

Snape sighed. "Better we do it together then. Come over here." Harry stepped towards him and he picked him up. Then he took half a handful of a green powder from a bowl above the fireplace and threw it into the fire.

"When you travel in this way you have to be careful to speak clearly when you say where you want to go," Snape excplained as he stepped into the fire. "Malfoy Manor!"

Harry closed his eyes as everything around him started to keep changing colour, as other people passed them at hight speeds. He opened them again as he felt that Snape let him down.

They were in an old-fashioned living room, a tall man with a long face and pure blonde hair in front of him.

"You must be Harry Potter," the man said and Harry recognized him as Draco's Father.

"Uh, yes, sir," Harry replied.

"I told you what happened," Snape said to Draco's father. To Harry he said, "This is Lucius Malfoy."

"Good day, Mr. Malfoy," Harry said nervously.

"Sit down, sit down!" Lucius said gesturing wildly with his arms. "If it is true what Severus told me this is of upmost importance!"

Once everyone sat Severus asked Harry to repeat what had happened in his lesson earlier. He obeyed.

Lucius stared wide-eyed at the potion master.

"This seems worse than I expected," he whispered.

"Why? What did I see?" Harry asked not understanding.

Severus looked him in the pain. Harry became even more confused as he saw pain in the onyx eyes of his teacher. "You saw from the Dark Lord's point of view how he murdered your parents, Harry. The old man Dumbledore didn't expect anything like this to happen until after he came back."

"He?" Harry managed to say; he had a lump in his throat. "Voldemort?"

Lucius nodded. "From the moment he disappeared it was clear that one day he would return. We thought we had a lot of time to prepare you for his return, but hearing what you experienced today we cannot be sure how much longer we have."

"In what lesson did it happen?" Snape questioned.

"Defence against the dark arts," Harry replied.

"Quirrel!" Severus exclaimed. "I should have known the first time!"

"Why, did something like this happen before?" Lucius asked curiously.

"Something similar. Harry suddenly started getting pain spams in the middle of his lesson. I think it is possible that the Dark Lord's spirit is in Quirrel's body. Does he do anything special when your scar starts hurting?"

"Both times he had his back to me," Harry recalled.

"The turban," Severus muttered. "Could it be that he is wearing the turban because he has something at the back of his head?"

"Maybe something to do with the Dark Lord," Lucius mused. "Anyway, if he is able to enter your mind Harry at any time he wants - possibly even without you noticing - it is extremely dangerous for anyone around you. Severus will need to teach you Occlumency, and maybe even Legilimency later on."

"Legi- what?"

"Legilimency is the art of entering other people's minds, just like he did to you. Occlumency is the art of preventing people from doing that."

"Oh."

Lucius sighed deeply. "I suggest we tell Harry a bit more about the Dark Lord and what he saw today." Severus nodded in agreement.

* * *

"Professor Snape," Harry whispered as soon as they had come back to Hogwarts. He hadn't even understood half of what he had been told; he had to keep thinking about his parents.

"Yes, Harry?"

He swallowed before he dared to ask, "Sir, did you like my mother?" He remembered the pain in his teacher's eyes as he had been told what he had seen, and he was sure that it hadn't been because of his father.

Severus closed his eyes, inhaling deeply through his nose. "Yes," he finally answered opening his eyes again. "I did like her. I liked her very much in fact. She was a good person. You got your intelligence from her, boy. I haven't seen anyone in all my teaching years brew a potion like you, like your mother."

Harry nodded, turning to leave.

"Tell Flint to go to Minerva and tell her the Gryffindor's can have the pitch tonight, you shouldn't be flying after what happened today."

Again Harry nodded. Once the door closed behind him he had to smile. He couldn't help but wonder what would have happened if his mother had chosen Professor Snape instead of James Potter.


	5. Sententia

**Existence**

**Chapter 5: Sententia**

Instead of going straight to the Slytherin common room he went to the astronomy tower. He needed time to take in everything that had happened earlier. Harry hdn't even been here at Hogwarts for a full month and almost already regretted coming here. He had always been a nobody, the one no one cared about. The person to get beaten up by his fellow students for no reason. The person to blame things on. For eleven long years he'd had to suffer emotionally, suppress his feelings and the longing to show everyone that he wasn't the stupid idiot everyone thought he was. Then someone suddenly decided to tell him about this new world, a world in which he was famous, in which he could express his intelligence freely. A place he could have friends, where he wasn't beaten up and where people care about him. Why couldn't he have been told about all this sooner? Harry couldn't help but feel angry.

But then, he thought, if I hadn't come here and hadn't been told about the magical world everything in it things would still be as they were. Sure, he never had the greatest life, the best guardians but at least he had been comfortable in the world he had grown up in. He hadn't known about Voldemort, hadn't had to carry the weight of all people's hope that on day he would rescue them, defeat someone decades older than him like he did ten years ago.

As he climbed the stairs the images of his parents came back into his mind. Harry wondered how much different life would be if they were still there. Would he be a spoilt brat? Would he had gone to Gryffindor? If he had still gone to Slytherin, would they have been disappointed, angry even? Would he have made friends with people like Draco or Weasley at a young age? And what about his grandparents? Were they still alive? Sure, he knew that his grandparents from his mother's side were already dead, but what about his father's parents? Old Mr. and Mrs. Potter?

Harry reached the top of the tower. Going outside onto the railing-surrounded platform he breathed in the fresh air. So many questions. As he leant onto the railing staring over the Forbidden Forest a thought came into his mind. _What if I don't come back next year?_ Maybe if he didn't he could escape all this. He could go back to his old life, be a nobody again. No - it was impossible to get away from all this now that he was in the middle once again. _Could it be that this is why I had been brought away from the magical world in the first place? So that I could be safe until I start attending Hogwarts?_

_But why not give me something to look forward to? To make me realize that I'm not a freak? _However, Harry realized that if he had been told it would have been impossible to go around the fact that he would have to fight one of the strongest wizard of all times some time in the future without mentioning it. They probably didn't want to fright him away from the magical world, from what he should call his home.

He sighed, watching birds soar through the air.

"If only I had those wings," he whispered, "I would fly high into the sky, leave my life behind for ever. I would be so free. No more sadness no more pain no more expectations. Flying to the sky would be all I'd do."

While he stood there following the birds with his eyes he wondered when he would face Voldemort. _Am I going to meet him more than once before the final battle?_ Then the unthinkable thought made its way into his mind._ How many people, friends, teachers and family members are going to die between now and that moment which will decide everything? Will I be able to take their loss or will I go crazy?_

There were so many things he didn't know yet. Would he know everything when it was time? But then, wouldn't people die in the final battle as well? Would he, in the end, lose everyone he cared about?

Harry remembered the hat and the question. **Why do people wear masks at the carnival?** Well, the most obvious answer was to hide their identity. If no one knew who they are they could do anything they wanted. That's why robbers wear masks, and even some wrestlers do the same. Was there a deeper answer to that question?

Harry knew that he had to go and tell McGonnagal about the changes with Quidditch practice, but he didn't want to leave. althouh it was getting colder and colder he liked the peace, the silence. He watched the sun slowly set. It must be something near eight. He had detention, too. Harry didn't have any other choice than to leave.

As he walked down the stairs he wished that it was possible that he could transform into any animal he wanted to. Wait - what was he saying? There _had_ to be a way to do that in the magical world! But whom to ask?

* * *

"You are five minutes early Potter," McGonnagal stated as Harry enterd her classroom. She was at her desk grading papers.

"Professor Snape told me to tell you that Gryffindor has Quidditch practice this evening and Slytherin tomorrow," Harry said.

"What?! He can't do that!" the transfiguration teacher shouted outraged standing up. She left the classroom in a hurry. Harry shrugged and went over to one of the bookshelves, pulled a random one out and opened it somewhere in the middle. His eyes were instantly caught on two words: _Finite Incantatum_. Next to it stood: _Stops any current spells_.

"Seems quite useful," Harry muttered paging through the book. He looked up and pointed his wand at one of the desks. "Reducto!" he said loudly and a second later the piece of furniture exploded.

"Shit!" Harry swore wide-eyed with fear trying to find a counter spell before McGonnagal returned. The best thing he could find was _Avifors _which would turn the wooden bits into birds. It took him several attempts to get it right but finally he succeeded and opened one of the windows to let dozens of birds out. Jut as he closed it the transfiguration teacher came back.

"Where did that table go?" she asked confused as she saw the empty space.

"I don't know," Harry said innocently. McGonnagal gave him an odd look but didn't say anything further.

The rest of his detention Harry spent cleaning the classroom. Every time McGonnagal didn't pay attention to him he attempted to do some more charms.

"Accio," he muttered repeatedly pointing his wand at one of the books in the book shelf. "_Accio!_" However, he didn't have enough time to try it often enough to succeed. Because of that he attempted to do it over and over again in his dorm later that night.

"Cut it out!" Blaise shouted as Harry made his pillow escape from beneath his head. "Some people are trying to sleep here!"

"Sor-ry," Harry muttered throwing the pillow back. He was just too happy that he mastered that charm in so little time.

* * *

"... and homework will be a foot-long essay on the side-effects of the Forgetfulness Potion if too much or not enough is consumed or if the potion was brewed messily," Snape said ending the lesson. He watched everyone scribble it down.

Harry raised his hand.

"Yes, Potter?"

"Can we not do something more difficulty?" Harry questioned.

Snape raised eyebrows. "Does the famous Boy-Who-Lived find my homework too easy for his Holiness? How would you like a five-foot essay on not only covering the side-effects but also a _detailed _background on _each and every_ ingredient?"

Everyone started to shout in disbelieve.

"Five-foot essay it is then," Snape said sitting down at his desk. "Potter, please stay behind,"he finished as the bell rang to announce the end of the potion lesson. Once everyone had gone Harry walked over to his desk.

"Sir?"

"You have your first occlumency session on Saturday after lunch," his Head of House said while starting to grade some papers. As nothing else was being said Harry left. In a couple of hours he had Quidditch practise, no time to worry about what would happen on Saturday.

Walking up the staircase to the groundfloor he saw the rest of the Quidditch team walk towards the Great Hall. Marcus Flint waved.

"You up for practise?" he asked when Harry came over to him.

"I guess so," Harry replied.

Graham Montague laughed. "After the first time it is nothing to worry about anymore. Well, at least until your first game comes."

"Let's hope you are as good as Marcus boasted," Adrian Pucey said as they sat down. "Believe me, if you want to beat all the other house it's not good enough to play Quidditch, you have to_ live_ it."

Flint shook his head. "Don't listen to Graham and Addy. They're idiots." Harry gave him a helpless look. "Oh - right. You don't know any of the others. Graham Montague and Adrian Pucey are our chasers, some of the best I've ever seen! The beaters are Peregrine Derrick and Lucian Bole who are sitting next to our keeper, Miles Bletchley. If you see them all play you'll be amazed what these lazy idiots can do."

"Who you calling a lazy idiot?" Lucian roared furiously.

"Calm down, calm down!" Marcus laughed. "You all know I'm just joking!"

"You better be," Adrian sneered filling his plate with mashed potatoes. "Otherwise I'll leave the team."

"Hey hey," Flint said hastily paling visibly. "I was just messing around! Of course you're all smarter than me - well, maybe except Miles and Graham."

"Harry's only in his first year," Peregrine stated. "You should be able to outsmart our li'l seeker Flint!"

Flint's face darkened. "From what I overhead the teachers saying in the staffroom our li'l seeker is pretty smart for his age - makes perfect potions, is able to perform advanced spells and charms and overall has the highest grades in his year."

"Advanced spells?"

"Addy, you know I mean for First year students!" Marcus defended himself.

"Did they really say all that?" Harry asked surprised filling his cup with pumpkin juice. He could hardly imagine McGonnagal going on about him being smart when she took away points from him almost every lesson.

"Nah, but Snape threatened me not to let you end up in the hospital wing unconscious because that would set us back a lot with house points," Flint explained.

"What'd he said he'd do?" Miles asked helping himself to a second portion of vegetables.

The Quidditch team captain grimaced as if he was in great pain. "You really don't wanna know!"

* * *

"Okay Harry," Marcus said as the team gathered around him. "Before training we usually warm up by flying a couple of rounds around the pitch. It helps us get used to the weather conditions we'll be playing in. After that I will release the balls, and all you'll have to do is concentrate in finding the snitch, okay?"

"Yep," Harry said nodding.

"While you are searching for the golden devil Miles will try to hinder the quaffle which I, Graham and Addy will pass between us from entering the goals. at the same time Perri and Lucian will _hopefully_ keep the bludgers away from us all."

They all mounted their brooms and after five rounds around the pitch Flint landed to release the four balls. Luckily for Harry it was a clear night and he could see the golden snitch glisten whenever light fell upon its surface. He totally forgot about the other players while he started chasing after it. Only when he felt something pass closely by his ear did he stop in surprise.

"For god's sake Bole!" Flint shouted from across the pitch. "You are meant to keep the bludgers _away_ from everyone,_ especially_ our seeker! Snape is going to kill me if Harry only gets slightly injured during practice! In future do your job properly or I'll look for another beater. What would you have done if this had been a game and Harry had gotten a concussion or worse? Huh?"

"Yeah yeah yeah," Lucian growled flying past Harry who continued looking for the snitch.

Following the end of practice they returned to the common room. There Draco was already half-way through his homework.

"Still working on that potion essay?" Harry grinned sitting down opposite him.

"Oh shut up," Draco moaned leaning back in his armchair. "This is _hard_. Why on earth did you have to backtalk Snape?"

"We are never going to learn anything otherwise," Harry sighed. "In the end you'll just copy it off me anyways, so why do you even bother to complain?"

Draco shrugged. "Maybe because there isn't anything else to complain about?"

Harry gave him a strange look. "You complain at home?"

Dragon grinned. "All the time Potter, all the time." Then he sighed. "Better get going Harry otherwise I'll never finish copying it in time." He pushed his potions book towards Harry who shook his head.

"Malfoy, the only reason why I backtalked was because I wanted to have to do some serious research about that potion rather than copy out from our potions book. Tomorrow in the library after breakfast." With that Harry stood up and left for the dorm Draco in the background grimacing at the amount of work he would have to do.


	6. Proprius Donum

**Existence**

**Chapter 6: Proprius Donum**

"Like I have told you before," Severus said looking at Potter who sat in a chair opposite his desk, "Occlumency is the art of protecting your mind from being looked into by other people. Few master it, and even fewer master Legilimency. For your own sake I hope that you will master it within some weeks."

"What if I don't?" Harry asked frightened.

Severus sighed. "If only I knew, Harry; it is hard to say. The Dark Lord might suddenly decide to leave you alone, or he might torment you more and more. However, if he does leave you alone there is still a chance that he returns to entering your mind at a later date. I do very much hope that you don't want your mind to become a book to everybody who is capable to legilimency?"

"Of course not, sir."

"Good. Let us begin then. I want you to try and picture a wall or something like that, and, when I will attempt to enter your mind you have to try and push me out."

"A wall?!"

"Yes. You can try and use the wall to keep me outside your mind. Let me put it like this: your mind is a castle surrounded by a great wall. I, the enemy, try to take over the castle and with the help of the wall you have to try and keep me outside. Got it?"

"I think so," Potter replied slowly.

Severus nodded stepping away from him. He raised his wand pointing at the boy's head. "Ready?"

Harry nodded.

"_Legilimency!_"

Just like he'd suspected Harry couldn't keep him outside for a single second. Thus he saw pictures from the boy's past. There were images of Potter cleaning the house as a young boy, of him cooking at a slightly older age and of him being bullied by his cousin. Most of all it surprised Severus to see a lot of darkness with the occasional glimpse of light, some times even one or two broken toys.

As he returned from Harry's mind Severus saw the boy still sitting in the chair, but this time sweating and panting.

"Here," Severus said almost worried giving him a bar of chocolate. Maybe Potter was a bit young to learn occlumency? But then, what would happen if he didn't? The Dark Lord would be able to read his every thought.

"Sorry," Potter whispered after swallowing some of the chocolate.

"You shouldn't be. It was your first time, I'd never have expected you to succeed instantly."

Harry shrugged closing his eyes. He tried to breathe more regularly as he slowly relaxed, starting to meditate.

Severus grinned. If he was careful enough now he could enter Harry's mind slow enough to give him time to fight it off, rising the boy's hopes and making him feel as if he had done something good.

"Legilimency," the potion master muttered going as slow as he could. Immediately he could feel Potter fighting against him, and he was careful not to move forwards too fast. But no battle is left unfinished.

Snape was able to see even more images from Harry's childhood. There were memories of him being chased by dogs, of him getting even more bullied by his cousin and even other students at school and again that darkness was visible. It drove Severus nearly mad that he couldn't figure out what it was.

"You did good," he told Potter once the boy had recovered. "Better than I expected."

"Really?" There was a glimmer of hope in the young boy's eyes.

"Yes, really Harry. I think you should go to your dorm now and rest a bit. Oh, by the way, how did the Quidditch practice go?"

"Great, although Marcus kept telling Lucian off for not keeping good enough control over the bludgers; Perri had to do most of the work to keep those balls away from us all."

"I see, I see."

* * *

By the time Harry got into bed he was so tired that he slept for two hours straight. When dinner time arrived he was fully awake with his energy restored. He went downstairs.

"You've _gotta _help me with my history of magic homework!" Draco yelped as soon as Harry arrived in the common room. "I just mess that stupid diagram up _every _time!"

"You should have copied it off the board when Binns drew it on," Harry sighed taking the quill from Malfoy. "Here." Potter drew a couple of straight lines, scribbled some names down and gave it to Draco. "You only have to copy it."

"_Again? _Can't I just take this?" Malfoy groaned.

Harry shook his head. "Even Binns will recognise the different handwritings."

"You sure?"

"Draco, let's go to dinner," Harry grunted. "We can argue later. For now I'm starving."

The two of them left for the Great Hall, followed by some more Slytherins craving to fill their stomaches. All of them went up to the ground floor where they met a bunch of the Gryffindors.

"There he is!" Ronald exclaimed pointing at Harry. "There is Potter!"

"What on earth?" Harry said irritated as the Gryffindors closed up on him and the Slytherins. "What did I ever do to you?"

A tall guy stepped forward. One of the older Slytherins whispered into Potter's ear, "That's Oliver Wood, the Quidditch captain of the cowardly lions. This whole thing is probably about Quidditch or something."

If this was about Quidditch then there could only be two answers to the Gryffindor's anger: either it was about Harry joining the Quidditch team when he was still in Year One or it was about the sudden change in Quidditch pratise time earlier that week.

"Listen to me Potter," red-faced Wood said through gritted teeth. "Either you leave the Quidditch team of those snivelling idiots or all of us Gryffindors will make school life a lot harder for you."

"Harry's the best seeker we've had in a long time!" Draco yelled. "He's not going to leave the team just because you tell him to."

"Oh yeah, Malfoy? _Everybody _knows that he was meant to be in our house, not yours!"

Harry stepped in front of Draco. "Oliver," he said calmly. "There is a reason why Professor Snape wanted me to be in the team in the first place - because I'm good. I got into the team and I don't see why I should leave it. If you have a problem with my decision, I don't care."

Wood raised his wand seconds later and swung it, yelling "Stupefy!"

As if he had awaited that Harry raised his hand the same moment, palm facing Wood, and called, "Protego Totalus!" The jet of red light reflected from an invisible bubble which had formed around anyone standing behind Harry and hit Wood straight in the chest; he fell backwards onto the floor.

"What on earth is going on here?" Snape inquested coming up the staircase. He looked at Wood who was laying unconscious on the stone floor and then his eyes wandered to Harry.

"Potter, I think you should come with me," he snarled.

"Sir -"

"_Potter, come with me_."

Harry swallowed looking frightened at Draco before he followed his Head of House who had turned around and strode back to the dungeons. Once they reached Snape's office they entered and inside Harry was gestured to sit down.

"Sir, please -"

"Did you have to suppress magical accidents when you were living with your relatives?" Severus asked sharply without letting him explain himself.

"Magical accidents, sir?"

"You know, letting abnormal things happen without wanting to."

"Oh yeah, I had to."

"Then it would seem plausible that you bottled them up and now that you start to perform magic every day you get sudden bursts of extreme powers!"

"Sir?"

"Harry," Severus said looking the boy in the eyes. "That what just happened isn't normal for a First Year student. Even some of the seventh year students cannot perform the Protego Totalus strong enough to protect a whole group of people from spells. Furthermore it is even more unusual that someone like you who hasn't even known about the magical world until a couple of months ago can perform _wandless _magic! Normally that takes weeks and weeks of practise, and even then only the best wizards and witches will be capable of doing it! Harry, with the right training you could be able to do great things, help the magical world in many ways!"

"What?" Harry asked dazed. All this confused him too much. As well as that he felt tired again, even more than after his first occlumency session earlier.

Severus sighed. "You can rest in my quarters again, I don't want you to face anyone else right now."

* * *

After Harry had rested for some time and had eaten some of the food the house elves had brought to Snape's quarters he and his teacher sat down in the living room to talk.

"You have seemed to be especially bright since the first time I saw you," Severus began. "And you have proven to be exactly that: intelligent. To be honest, you are smarter than a lot of the students in the second or even third years. Do you have any idea why that is?"

Harry shrugged. "i've always been extremely smart but I had to hide it when I lived with my aunt and uncle."

Snape nodded thoughtfully. "Tell me more about your childhood," he requested a moment later.

"Well," Harry stammered token by surprise. "There isn't really much to say. I guess I had a sort of normal childhood..."

"Don't lie, Potter. I can spot a liar from a thousand miles away. You know very well that you didn't had a normal childhood. Give me details."

Harry shifted uneasily in his seat. "What exactly do you want to know, sir?" he muttered looking at the floor.

Severus rolled his eyes in an annoyed manner. "How many people bullied you when you went to primary school, what kind of chores did you have to do at your home, how did your relatives punish you when you misbehaved. That sort of thing Potter."

Harry paled. "How - how do you know?"

His Head of House looked at him with raised eyebrows. "At the moment Potter I can read your mind like I read any book, and your memories which I saw earlier today gave me enough information to draw some theories."

"Okay then," Harry said breathing out through his teeth. "For about as long as I could walk properly Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon let me do all sorts of chores around the house, for example clean all the rooms, do the dishes, sometimes even cook meals. I did most of the gardening too - at least in the back garden. Aunt Petunia always did the front to show off to the neighbours.

"Ever since I started going to school Dudley and his friends bullied me. At the beginning I always got the best grades in all my classes, but as soon as Uncle Vernon found out that I made Dudley look dumb he said that as long as I continue showing off he would continue to give me more and more chores and even lock me into the cupboard under the stairs."

Severus stared at the floor. The cupboard under the stairs, eh? That must have been the darkness in Harry's memories.

"Anything else?"

Harry shook his head.

"How long would they lock you in there?"

Potter shrugged. "Depends on what I did. Between a couple of hours and two or three days."

"_Days?!_" Severus exclaimed shocked and angered.

Harry nodded.

"Any... any physical abuse?"

"No."

"Where was your bedroom?" Severus asked after a moment.

"It was the cupboard under the stairs until I started to get letters from Hogwarts. That's when they got scared and gave me Dudley's second room," Harry informed his teacher.

_What on earth?_ Severus thought outraged. _That Boy has lived for eleven years crammed into the cupboard under the stairs?!_


	7. Poena

****

**Existe****nce**

**Chapter 7: Poena**

Following the end of their talk Severus instructed Harry to go straight to the common room and from there to his dorm. He was not to stop or talk with anyone about what happened to Wood.

Harry was so confused by everything that had happened, by what his Head of House had told him, that instead of facing his fellow students he decided to go for a flight to try and clear his mind. After getting a broom from the broom cupboard he left the castle and made his way over to the Quidditch pitch. Outside it was pitch dark; the sky was covered in clouds covering the moon. As the ground was quite muddy Harry guessed it'd been raining some time during when he had rested.

Pushing himself off the ground he closed his eyes and smiled as the cold air touched his warm skin and muffled up his hair. He flew numerous rounds around the pitch while having a hard time to make out where the stands were positioned. More than once he nearly flew into one.

After about half an hour Harry felt so cold that he thought he must have already frozen to death. Descending to land he flew a final round. Afore he realized it he was flying straight at one of the tall stands at a high speed.

_Crap!_ he thought starting to panick. Closing his eyes tightly he was waiting for the crash and the following pain.

"What?!" Harry asked aloud as he felt himself stop moving. He looked down. The ground was a mere two feet beneath him. _Maybe the broom landed itself? Maybe I subconsciously landed it?_

As soon as his feet touched the muddy soil an urge to throw up overcame him. Eventually, after wretching, his dinner came up.

Harry groaned as he sat down on the ground, tired, cold and feeling sick. Getting back on his feet he noticed most of his body and clothes was covered in dirt.

Slowly he made his way back to the school building, dragging the broom behind him. Dizziness overcame him upon his entrance. Harry let the broom fall down on the floor; he was too exhausted to carry it to the broom cupboard.

Somehow he made his way down to the dungeons without tripping on the stairs. Once down there he had to lean against the walls and rest for some moments before he could continue, stumbeling towards the entrance of the Slytherin common room. More than one time he fell to the ground, needing a coupld of minutes to get up again. His whole body was on fire while it he felt as cold as ice. Harry could hardly walk another step as he muttered the password to gain entrance to the common room of his house.

"Where were you?" he could hear Draco's voice, making out a blurry figure coming towards him. "What the -? Why are you all muddy? Harry, what happened? Harry?!"

But the darkness had already overtoken him.

* * *

Severus refused to let Harry go to the hospital wing as Madam Pomfrey came to collect the boy from his quarters. He had gone to get Potter as soon as Draco had come running to his office confusing him by talking fastly and in an irritating way about Potter having collapsed. Once he had figured out what happened through legilimency - Draco hadn't been able to calm down enough to speak clearly and slowly - Severus had gone to get the famous boy.

"You can't do this!" Poppy exclaimed after her arrival in Snape's living room. "Potter needs to go to the hospital wing where he can be cared for properly!"

"He is not moving from my quarters," Severus sneered.

"For all you know he could have a lung infection!"

"For all _you _know he might have broken bones! It is the best if he stays here until he is better, Poppy. Believe me."

The healer glared at him. "You know what? I'm going to get the headmaster. He will sort this out." Then she went through the floor network.

Minutes later most of the teachers and half the students stood in front of Severus's quarters attempting to get more detailed information on what has happened. Immediately after Pomfrey's leave Severus had disabled the floo network connection to his fireplace so that no one else could come in without permission. He only opened the door to let Dumbledore and Pomfrey in.

"Severus, what is all this about?" Dumbledore asked sternly once he had been served a cup of tea and a couple of lemon drops. They all sat in the living room.

"Harry is in my house and I think it is better for him if he stays here until he is better," Snape said. "He knows me and he trusts me."

Pomfrey grunted, "He trusts me too, you know."

Severus looked at her from the side. "I don't see why anyone would want to trust _you_."

"Oh! How rude!"

"Hey hey," the headmaster said calmly stirring his tea. "Severus, do you have some sugar?"

"Headmaster!" the healer protested shocked. "This is more important than your tea! We are talking about the well-being of one of the students!"

"You are right," Albus agreed placing the cup of tea on the coffee table. "Where is Harry right now?"

"In my bedroom," Severus answered.

Dumbledore started sucking on a lemon drop while he was thinking.

"Until young Potter wakes up he stays here," he finally decided, standing up. "Then we can ask him if he would prefer to continue staying here or if he would prefer to move to the hospital wing." Poppy opened her mouth to reply but he shook his head. "Poppy, let us all go to bed. We've had quite enough for today."

* * *

In the days it took Harry to awake Severus was by his bedside most of the time. The boy had developed high fever even before he had collapsed, and his temperature was wavering between 38 degrees celcius and up to 43 degrees celcius. After a full week it settled down to 37 degrees celcius.

While in a delirious state Severus heard Harry mutter things like "Leave me alone!" and "No! PLEASE! DON'T!". It worried him sick. Was the boy re-living parts of his childhood?!

For that first week Hooch covered Snape's lessons, giving him more time to look after Harry. As Potter's fever ceased Severus took up some of his lessons again, mostly the 6th and 7th Year whom he knew he could trust if he suddenly had to leave the lesson for some minutes to go and look how Harry was.

Halfway through the second week Harry woke up. However, Severus wanted him to be fully energized when he had to decide whether or not he wanted to stay where he was so he let him sleep for another two days, giving him a sleeping potion after lunch.

Once Severus was satisfied that Harry was more or less energized again he finally asked the question.

"I'm not a burden?" Harry asked carefully after thinking for a moment.

Snape looked at him. "No. You are not a burden."

"Then it'd be okay if I stay here?"

"Otherwise I wouldn't have asked," Severus said rolling his eyes. "You're staying then?"

Harry nodded wrinkling his nose. "Madam Pomfrey kinda scares me."

As the days went by Harry started to get better and better. Severus said that if he was lucky he could be fit enough to go to the Halloween Feast on the thirty-first of October. The last day of the month approached and Harry felt good enough to get out of bed. In the evenings Draco came to visit him.

"Halloween is going to be so exciting!" Draco exclaimed on the day of the 30th. "I can't wait; the older students have been telling us about it every day for the last two weeks! Next to the Welcome Feast at the beginning of the school year and the last dinner of the year the Halloween Feast is meant to be the best meal."

"Really?" Harry asked smiling broadly. They were sitting in the fireplace in the living room of Snape's quarters doing their homework.

"But you shouldn't eat too much candy," Severus warned looking over at them. He was sitting on the sofa grading papers. "You don't want to get stomach aches."

Draco rolled his eyes. "Of course we won't, Uncle Sevvie." To Harry he whispered, "Stuff yourself full, you won't know the next time we'll get sweets!"

"I heard that, Dragon," Severus sighed.

The next evening Draco came to collect Harry so that they could go to dinner together. All of the Slytherin students were glad to see Harry again. Marcus announced that as soon as he was allowed to they would double the Quidditch practice time to make sure everyone was ready for their first game.

All in all Harry was surprised at the choice of food they received, but he was irritated that the only person missing was Quirrel. He remembered what Snape had said about Voldemort's spirit being in the DADA teacher, and he wondered if that had something to do with his absence.

Half way through dinner the doors to the Great Hall were suddenly flung open and Professor Quirrel came stumbling in, panting. He made his way towards the Head Table while everone's eyes followed his frail body frightened. He kept yelling, "Troll! There's a troll in the castle! TROLL!"

Panick broke out. All the students were either attempted to get out of the room at the same time or they were screaming their heads off in fright. There was nothing but chaos as the news were absorbed.

"_QUIET!_" the headmaster roared standing up. Once the students were still he continued. "Prefects, bring your fellow house members to your common rooms and stay there until your head of house comes."

A bit of order started to come in as students slowly started to follow Dumbledore's orders.

"This is cool," Draco grinned.

"Have you seen Hermione?" Harry asked looking at the Gryffindors who were already exiting the hall.

"Granger? No, why should I care?"

"I haven't seen her the whole evening. I'm kind of worried, that's all."

"Oh, right. You don't know," Malfoy suddenly remembered as he lined up. "Weasley called her a Mudblood Nerd. Since then she's been crying in the girl toilets."

"That -"

"Harry, don't even start," Draco said annoyed. Harry sighed as he stepped next to his friend and they all started to move out of the hall.

"Sorry. It's just, she seems to be a nice enough girl and then an idiot like Redhead Ron comes along and makes her so upset. It just makes me angry," Harry explained.

They all started walking towards the dungeons. From one moment to the next however images started flashing in front of Potter's eyes. He didn't know what was happening.

_The feet of a massive creature. Screams. Cubicles broken into thousands of pieces. Water spraying wildly in every direction._

"_Harry?!_" Draco's voice yelled through Harry's head. He came back to reality.

"We need to go and save Hermione!" Harry said snapping out of her mind. He was sure that he had just witnessed her being attacked by the troll. "Now!"

"But -"

Harry had already pulled Draco out of line. All the Slytherins were so busy looking around for the troll that they didn't notice them staying behind.

"Do you even know where Granger is?" Draco grunted angrily. He didn't understand why he should risk his life to save her.

Harry bit his lip trying to enter her mind again. Oh, if only he knew legilimency! He started to panick. What if she needed their help desperately?Just then he felt energy fill his body and his mind went blurry, then it entered Hermione's mind again. _How is this possible? Why can I suddenly go back?_

This time things were different. Instead of just seeing everything from Hermione's view his mind left the toilets, and then it went all the way down to the Great Hall.

"This way!" Harry muttered taking off into the direction of the main staircase. He felt tired.

It took them a couple of minutes to find the room they were looking for but when they did it wasn't hard to see that the troll was in there. The door was lying a couple of meters away on the floor, ripped out of its hinges. Water flooded the floor.

"Why do we have to do this?" Draco groaned as they trotted through the puddle which had formed itself on the stone ground.

"If you don't want to do this you can leave," Harry said furiously. Why couldn't Malfoy just help Hermione without having to object? After all she was on of their fellow students even if she was in a different house.

Draco grunted as they stood a meter away from the door frame. Looking inside Harry could see the troll smashing the toilet cubicles with a club. He was a lot taller than he had expected and it scared him a bit. However, as he heard Hermione screech in fright all his fears were forgotten and he charged into the lavatory closely followed by Draco.

"Hey, dumbass!" Harry shouted and the troll turned to look at him. "Ugly one! I'm down here!"

In an idiotic way the creature started swinging his club around, attempting to hit Harry. Taking the chance of being ignored Hermione, who had been hiding in the left overs of the cubicles, ran across the room to hide beneath the sinks just in time to duck under them as the troll started paying attention to her again.

"For god's sake!" Draco exclaimed. "We'll never be able to distract that idiot long enough for us all to excape without him noticing!"

Harry found it hard to stand on his feet, he was so exhausted. His eyes wandered to Hermione and it pained him to see her in that position. Suddenly anger filled him. Whoever had let that troll in should have thought about the consequences beforehand. What if one of the students was seriously injured or even killed? He was so busy thinking about all that that he didn't realize that his body re-energized. He didn't realize that he lifted his hand up and pointed his palm at the troll. He didn't realize that a jet of red light escaped his skin shooting right into the troll's back. He only came back to reality when Draco pushed him out of the way and he landed upon the rest of the broke cubicles. Seconds later the troll landed unconsciously there where Harry had been standing.

"Harry?" Draco asked carefully looking at his friend who was on his hands and knees panting vigorously.

"Th-thank you so much guys," Hermione stammered slowly coming out from beneath the sinks. "I am so glad you came. If you hadn't I probably... I probably..."

McGonnagal, Snape and Quirrel appeared in the door frame.

"What on earth has been going on here?" McGonnagal asked paling as she saw the troll. "Malfoy, Potter, explain all this!"

"It- it was all my fault," Hermione said stepping forward. She bit her lip and looked away. "I read about trolls only last week and believed I had enough knowledge to take him on myself. Luckily - luckily Harry and Malfoy came to my rescue." She swallowed and looked into the eyes of her Head of House. "Otherwise I would probably be dead now."

"Why, I have never experienced such stupidity!" McGonnagal exclaimed outraged. "I would have thought better of you, Miss Granger! Twenty points from Gryffindor!" With that she left the scene, Quirrel hurrying after her.

Severus looked at Granger. "10 points from Gryffindor for lying. However, thirty points to Gryffindor for courageously trying to prevent fellow students from receiving punishment." Ignoring her and Draco he went over to Harry who was still on his hands and knees trying to get his breath back.

"You okay?" Severus asked softly crouching down.

"Twice!" Harry gasped. "Two bursts of energy in less than an hour!"

Snape instantly helped Harry up. As his legs gave in beneath him Severus managed to scoop him up before he fell to the ground.

"Is he going to be okay?" Hermione asked hoarsly. She felt guilty seeing him like this after he'd helped her.

As Severus walked out he said, "Evenually he will be, but I can't say when." He sighed. Why always Harry? Couldn't that boy just rest for one time?


	8. Sarcolagos

**Existence**

**Chapter 8: Sarcolagos**

Harry didn't hear anything from the hat again until the middle of November, the same night he went back to his dorm once again back on his feet, feeling better than ever before.

**And? What have you figured out?**

_Well, the only reason why people wear masks at the carnival which I could think of is that because they were masks so no one knows who they are and they can do anything they want, commit any crime, socialise with anyone. All in all those masks conceal your identity._

**Good. The next thing I want you to think abouy is this: How do you know what is right and what is wrong?**

* * *

December arrived bringing snow storms and coldness with it. The mood was swaying between the excitement of Christmas and the depression of the wintry months ahead. Teachers started to go easy on students with homework while students became more lazy. Thus, as Harry was one of the few who did it properly, Slytherin continued to gain marks.

"Are you going to stay here over the holidays?" Draco questioned Harry while they were sitting in the library working on their essay for transfiguration.

"Yep," Harry replied. "You going home then?"

Draco shrugged. "Hardly anyone stays. I mean, it is Christmas. How about you come to the manor? Uncle Sevvie will be staying a couple of days too as well as Blaise, Crab and Goyle and some other family friends. We always have a big celebration and the ball at Christmas Eve! You simply can't miss it!"

Harry laughed. "As much as I'd like to come I never really celebrated Christmas before, and I don't mind if I can celebrate it more or less on my own."

"Your choice."

"Anyways, what do you want for Christmas?" Harry asked.

Draco grinned. "Did Uncle Sevvie tell you if you give him the list and the money he'll get you what you needs? He tells that to all the Slytherins in First and Second year because they can't go to Hogsmeade yet."

"Then what do you want?"

Malfoy grinned. "What other than sweets?"

Harry shook his head. "You're no better than Red Ronny."

"I am not an over-eating pig!" Draco shouted angrily.

"_Be quiet!_" Pince hissed. "_We are in a library thank you very much!_"

* * *

A week before the start of the holidays Snape hung up a piece pf parchment in the common room for anyone who should stay to write their name on. Harry was the only one who did.

"You sure you don't want to come to Malfoy Manor?" Draco asked a last time as they mounted the steps to the dorm.

Harry nodded. "Maybe next year, but this time I want to stay here. Read some books, do some homework, expore the castle. That sort of thing."

All the teachers were glad the holidays were just in front of the door and thus they let the students muck about a bit, giving them the choice between learning or having a bit of fun. Only Snape stayed cold.

"But sir!" Weasley said in their last potion lesson before Christmas. "This is our last lesson, why can't we do something fun?"

"This is still school, Weasley," Snape snarled looking down at him. "I don't care if tomorrow should be the last day on earth, you'll do work. Anyone wh hasn't finishd by the end of the lesson will get a detention _tonight_."

All in all the work he had set was quite easy: copy out the instructions for a potion out of their books and give a short description about why each step was important.

That night after dinner the headmaster stood up before anyone left the hall and announced that anyone who didn't have detention with Professor Snape was to leave. Harry was utmost surprised to find that only he, Draco, Hermione and some of the Year 7 and Year 6 students left. Everyone else stayed.

"How's it been going Hermione?" Harry asked as they left the hall. Since the troll incident they hadn't exchanged a word. "Has Ron said anything else to you?"

She shook her head. "At least not to my face."

"Come on," Draco said pulling on Harry's sleeve. "We gotta get back to the dorm, I want to give you your present before the other three come back!"

"Okay okay okay," Harry said to him. He then turned back to Hermione.

"You going home for Christmas?" She nodded. "Well, Merry Christmas then!"

"Merry Christmas to you too!" she said already half-way up the main staircase.

* * *

"... and don't forget to send Hedwig to tell me everything that happens here," Draco told Harry as he stepped into the Hogwart's Express. "Oh, and of course I'll send you sweets. Don't forget, open your present on the twenty-fifth and not a day earlier!"

"I know," Harry laughed. "I know. See you in two weeks!" As the train departed Harry waved Draco good bye. Then, along with the other seven students who were staying and Hagrid who had brought them all to the train station he went back to the castle. He might me alone this Christmas but at least he knew he was going to have a present.

The castle seemed empty without all the students. After entering he went to look at the House Glasses who were counting the points. There were four sand-clock-like glasses, each with stones in them. Gryffindor's glass had just enough stones to cover its ground while Slytherin was half full. Both Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw were roughly filled up one-quarter. Just then some more stones fell into Slytherin's glass while a couple disappeared from Gryffindor moments later.

"Snape's probably grading our last homework," Harry smiled. He noticed that Draco wasn't beside him, agreeing and making a stupid comment about Gryffindor. This Christmas he would really be lonely. At least at the Dursley's he'd been able to listen to them having fun and unpack their presents, Dudley's excited squeals when he found out that his father had bought him the newest toy on the market, his relative's out-of-tune Christmas carols which they sung every year. This time it would only be him.

* * *

After grading the final piece of homework and after taking away the last point from Gryffindor Severus set off to Diagon Alley. He still had all the galleons he'd received from the bet at the beginning of the school year and he planned to use that money to buy Harry something for Christmas. He knew exactly what that boy needed.

* * *

The last couple of days before the twenty-fifth flew by like a water drop fell from the tap into the sink. Harry spend his time finish reading his school books and finishing off any left over homework. He didn't take in that all the people who remained at school were decorating the whole castle because he was 24/7 in the Slytherin common room amidst his books, often sleeping there. Snape made sure that the house elves always brought him something to eat and that the fire was always warm enough.

On the evening of the twenty-third Severus went to look how Harry was just before he would set off for the manor. He found the boy sleeping in an armchair, open books and parchments which were partially written on all around him. Severus couldn't help but smile. He took the book on Harry's lap, closed it and put it on a pile of other school books. He then took a blanket which was on the floor and put it around Harry. It had been a wise decision of him to stay at Hogwarts this Christmas, he needed the peace to relax a little.

The next morning as Harry woke up he found a cup of cocoa and a plate with chocolate covered toast on the table near him. Sleepily he got out of the armchair, drank and ate his breakfast and then he went up to the dorm. No one had been up there in a week and it was quite chilly. Following his entrance to his dorm he quickly got Draco's present and then went back downstairs to the warmth of the common room. In about twenty-four fours he would open it.

For the first time in days Harry left the Slytherin common room and was surprised to find the building decorated. He took a stroll around the snowy school grounds and then returned to the common room to write a letter to Draco.

_Dear Dragon,_

_Here at Hogwarts everything is fine - Professor Snape has probably told you. In the last couple of days I've studied a lot. When you're back at Hogwarts you can copy all the homework, eh?_

_You're pretty excited about the ball tonight, not? I'm just glad I have a present. It is all I could wish for, really._

_Well, see you in a week!_

_Yours, Harry P._

When Harry arrived at the Owl Tower Hedwig was more than happy to see him. After giving her a snack he gave her the letter and off she went.

As he passed the Great Hall on the way back he could hear people singing from within. The door opened and the headmaster looked out.

"Ah, Harry!" He smiled. "Haven't seen you in a long time, have I? Why don't you come in?"

"Thanks sir, but I still have some things to do," Harry muttered.

"Oh, come on! It is Christmas; forget about your work and have some fun! We need another person to sing the carols with!"

Harry shook his head. "Really, sir. I can't. Maybe next year."

Albus shrugged. "Your choice I guess."

Secretly Harry was glad. Although he knew all the Christmas carols off by heart - the Dursley's had sung them often enough - he had never ever sung before and if he had a choice between learning a new spell and singing for the first time ever, he would definately choose the spell.

It took him a while to master _Reducio_ and _Engorgio_ but when he did it was nearly midnight and he was tired. At least he had something to look forward to in the morning other than in the past Christmasses.

Once he woke up he couldn't believe his eyes. There was a whole Christmas tree decorated beautifully and under it lay a dozen presents. Looking at the tags his disbelieve came to believe: they were all for him.

The first one was a large one and the tag said it was from Draco's family. His suspiciouns that it was a broom was fulfilled, but it wasn't just a broom.

"Oh my god!" Harry exclaimed gobsmacked. "This is the Nimbus 2000 in Diagon Alley in the summer He simply couldn't believe it. In the letter enclosed Lucius had written, "_Lead Slytherin to yet another victory with your present, Harry_!"

The next presents were from Hermione, the one Draco had given him, and from some other Slytherins. They were all books. Then he came to one which didn't say who it was from.

"Strange," Harry muttered. He ripped the paper open and a cloack fell into his lap. He raised his eye brows. He'd try it on later.

There was a single gift left.

_To: Mr. Harry P. From: S.S._

Curious what his Head of House had bought him he carefully tore the wrapping paper apart, and a bowl fell into his lap. Along with that came a letter.

_Dear Harry,_

_What you have received is a Pensieve. A Pensieve is a stone receptacle used to store and review memories._

_A witch or wizard can extract their own or another person's memories, store them in the Pensieve, and review them later. It also relieves the mind when it becomes cluttered with information. Anyone can examine the memories in the Pensieve, which also allows viewers to fully immerse themselves in the memories stored within, much like a magical form of real world virtual reality._

_Users of these devices view the memories from a third-person-point-of-view, providing a near-omniscient perspective of the events "memories" contained in the Pensieve have the appearance of silver threads. In order to add a memory to the Pensieve hold your the tip of your wand to your temple, think hard about the memory you want to get out of your head and then slowly move your wand away, letting the silver thread fall into the receptacle._

_I hope this will help you._

_Merry Christmas, S.S._

Harry smiled broadly. He spent the next couple of hours carefully selecting which memories he wanted to get out of his mind and which ones he wanted to keep. It wasn't really a hard decision, he kept none of the memories from the Dursley's but kept all of the ones from the magical world. He also realized that this could help him with exams: if he put everything that didn't have to do with the exam into the Pensieve and kept only what had to do with the subject, there was a bigger chance of him getting full points. He wondered if Severus had had the same idea when he had bought it.

* * *

Once the Christmas spirits had faded, the New Year been welcomed and after he had repeatedly flown his new broom with joy, Harry went back to his homework. Three days before the end of the holidays he didn't pay much attention on his way to the library, and for the first time ever he got seriously lost.

"Do not, unless you have a death wish, go near the third floor."

Harry recalled t he words Dumbledore had said on the first evening at Hogwarts. He wondered if he was just there, on the third floor.

"A bit of exploring can't be so bad, can it?" he muttered as he slowly advanced into a corridor leading off in one direction. It was dark, but the the further he walked forwards the more lamps turned themselves on. There wasn't a single door along the walls, and Harry was about to turn back to the stairs when he saw one about ten meters in front of him. Cautiously he went to it. Finding it locked only rose his curiousity.

"Meow!" he heard the voice of a cat. Abrutptly turning to look at it his heart stood still. It was Mrs. Norris, the caretaker's cat.

"Stupid beast," Harry muttered pulling his wand out. Where the cat was Flinch couldn't be far away. "Alohomora!" He slipped into the room behind the door and closed it just as he heard the caretaker approach his cat.

"Is there anyone, poppy?" Flinch's voice sounded just before the thick wooden door shut off outside sounds. Harry listened intensely to figure out if they had left yet.

"Shush Draco," he hissed hearing growling behind him. It took him a minute to realize that Draco wasn't even with him. "What the devil?" he whispered turning one-eighty. The gigantic toungue of what turned out to be a three-headed dog dangled right in front of him face. Spit drooled on his clothes.

Suppressing a scream Harry reopened the door and charged out, not caring if someone awaited him on the otehr side as long as he got away from that strange creature.

By the time he had reached the dungeons his nerves had settled down enough for him to think clearly about what had just happened. Why would Dumbledore keep a three-headed dog in the school? Could it be that that dog was there to guard something? But if yes, what? Harry remembered the Pensieve. He figured if he relived that memory maybe he could find some more information in the room.

Upon his arrival in the common room he found Hedwig sitting on an armchair cleaning herself. She had a letter and parcel bound to her leg.

Dear Harry,

You won't believe of how fun the ball was this year! The food was better than ever before, and when we all woke up on the twenty-fifth we were astounded at the amount of gifts everyone received! I'll tell you about all the things I got one I'm back at Hogwarts.

In the parcel I've put some of the candy left over from the ball - after eating that three course dinner _no one _had been in the mood to eat them as well!

See you soon!

Your friend, D.M.

Harry smiled as the saw the amount of sweets Draco had sent him: the small box had given off the image of a medium amount of candy, but it turned out that it was jinxed to be bottomless and Harry guessed the sweets would last him for a whole year even if he had a couple of them every day.

When he finally came to reviewing his memory it took him several attempts to get around to looking through the room and not to stare at the huge beastly creature the whole time. After the seventh time of reliving the scene he was pretty sure that there wasn't anything unusual about the room that dog was kpt in, until after stepping into the Pensieve an eight time he scanned the floor for the couple of seconds he had. And then he noticed a trap door beneath one of the paws. What was that beast guarding?


	9. Notitia

****

**Existe****nce**

**Chapter 9: Notitia**

Harry was the only ones of the pupils who had stayed behind to go to Hogsmeade and welcome the ones who had gone away for the holidays back together with Hagrid.

"So how's it been going?" Harid asked as they trudged through the knee-high snow.

"Sorta okay," Harry replied crinkling his nose. "I mean, there is always an upside and downside to things, but I'm pretty sure that this is better than the school Aunt Petunia wanted to send me to." He shuddered. "The school uniform probably wasn't even the worst!"

Hagrid laughed. "Ye mum always had a fine humour, ya know? It has been a great surpise that you were sorted into Slytherin. Most of the teachers thought ol' Snape had messed with somethin', but it seems that the hat was right."

"Messed?" Harry questioned confused. "What do you mean?"

"Well, the teachers bet into which house the stu-" the giant stood still, his jaw dropping. "Forget what I said, forget what I said!" he said hastily as he picked up his walking speed again.

"What do you mean they bet?" the boy asked irritated and angry as he jogged along to keep up with Hagrid.

"Tralalalala!" he sang loudly his fingers in his ears to keep any sound out. "Ain't it a beautiful day? Tralalalala!"

Harry sighed, now running as Hagrid accelerated. He wouldn't get any useful information out of him any longer.

"What do you know about the three-headed dog on the third corridor?" he asked instead.

"Fluffy?" Hagrid stood dead still in his tracks. "You've sawn fluffy?"

Harry nodded eagerly. "I noticed he's standing on a trap door, do you know what it - I mean Fluffy - is hiding or rather guarding?"

"TRALALALALA!"

The boy-who-lived bit his lip in agony. Another failed conversation.

"How about the quidditch season?" he shouted looking up at Hagrid's face.

"Uh, dunno much about it," he answered grimacing. "All I know is that it's your house against Hufflepuff as soon as the snow melted." Then he started howling in pain. "I've said too much, I've said too much!"

Harry decided to stop talking.

A couple of minutes after they had arrived at Hogsmeade train station the train came in. Draco was one of the first ones out. He strode instantly over to where harry was standing with Hagrid.

"I have _so _much to tell you!" Draco grinned.

"You know where Flint is?" Harry whispered looking at Hagrid whose eyes wandered around in distress. "He gave away some Quidditch info which I wnat to give to the captain."

Draco laughed. "So fatso _is_ good for something!"

"And then I've got to tell you something," Harry ended.

"Why, here is my superstar!" Flint smiled as he approached them. "I heard Draco's father bought you a Nimbus 2000? We will _definitely _win this year again!"

"I've got insider information," Harry hissed in reply as they all started walking. "The first game will be as soon as the snow's gone, and it'll be us against Hufflepuff."

"Why are you so sure?" Flint asked not sure whether or not to believe his seeker.

Harry glanced up at Hagrid. "He might be fat and dumb, but he also talks a lot. On the way here I asked him a couple of questions."

Flint grinned and patted Harry on the back. "Good one, JP!"

"JP?" Draco asked irritated.

"My second name's James, so Marcus likes calling me JP," Harry explained while they exited Hogsmeade.

* * *

"What did you want to tell me?" Draco asked. They had arrived in their dorm and Harry had magically locked the door; neither Blaise, Crab nor Goyle would be able to open it. He sat down on a bed.

Harry went on his knees and roumaged under his bed, finally pulling out the Pensieve.

Draco's eyebrows raised. "A Pensieve?"

Harry nodded. "Professor snape gave it to me to Christmas."

"Was this all? Did you really have to lock the door for this? And me getting my hopes up..." Draco muttered getting off his bed.

"It's not all," Potter explained rolling his eyes. "I want to show you something that happened a couple of days ago. Accidentally I ended up on the third corridor, and this is what I found." They both entered the Pensieve.

Draco was paler than usual once they returned. "That old fool... keeping a beast like that in the school!"

"Hagrid seems to know something about this," Harry said. "When I asked him he said that dog is called Fluffy, but when I asked about the trap door he started ignorig me."

"Trap door?!"

They re-entered the Pensieve so that Draco could see for himself. By now Harry was used to seeing Fluffy. It really didn't seem so scary anymore.

Malfoy thought for a moment. "Maybe we can get that fatso drunk and then ask him more questions."

Harry agreed. "He also said something about the teachers betting in which house the new students come, I want to question him about that too."

"By the way, did you get anything good for Christmas except the Pensieve?"

"Well, of course the broom from your father, a couple of books and a cloak which I still haven't tried on."

As it was already late they both decided to wait until the next day to visit the giant groundskeeper. Following a good night's rest they were up early for breakfast. Harry noticed Hagrid was missing from the Head Table.

"I wonder where he is," he muttered.

"In his hut I'd think," Draco replied reaching for an apple.

"Had a good Christmas?" a voice behind them inquired. They looked around.

Draco nodded. "Like every year, sir."

Severus looked at Harry.

"Better than ever before," he grinned.

Snape leaned forward. "I expect you have both done your homework?"

"Uh... yeah, course I did it," Malfoy lied.

While their Head of House walked away Harry looked at the note Snape had secretly given him a second ago.

_3 p.m. my office - Occlumency S.S._

"Come on," Harry said standing up. "Let's go see what Hagrid is up to."

It was freezing outside, mostly because the sun had only come out half an hour or so. As they trudged through the massive amounts of snow they started talking.

"I wonder if he even has alcohol," Draco muttered. "Otherwise we came out here for nothing."

"Fresh air is always good," Harry replied.

"But not in this weather!" Malfoy shivered to make his point.

Hagrid's hut was about half a kilometer away from the main entrance. Normally it would take around seven minutes to walk there, but being slowed down by the snow made it fifteen. Frozen through to his bones Harry knocked on the thick wooden door.

"Who's there?" Hagrid's voice sounded from within.

"It's me, Harry!" Harry yelled shivering as the wind started blowing. "Can I come in? It's freezing out here!"

"Oh - of course, of course ye can!" The door opened, revealing the groundskeeper in his normal brown-coloured, roughly stitched clothes, but this time he also wore a pick apron.

"Apron?" Draco snorted as he stepped inside. Then his eyes wandered to a cauldron which hung over a huge fire. He stepped over to it. "What's that for an egg?"

"Oh, er," Hagrid stammered hurriedly closing the door. "Somethin' the headmaster asked me to look after, ya know?"

"Like you were told to look after Fluffy?" Harry asked instantly sitting down at a round table in the middle of the small hut. The fireplace was about a meter away, right next to it a cosy-looking bed made up of two hay mattrasses stacked over each other.

"No no," Hagrid grinned. "Fluffy was mine from the start on, ya know? Professor Dumbledore just -" He stopped, realizing what he was doing. "Oh Harry, Harry! Don't start again! I'll get into trouble for this, ya know?" He started to make some tea to warm the boys up.

"'Tis quite early, ain't it?" Hagrid noted. "Also 'tis so cold, nice of ya to visit me."

"You're welcome." Harry sniffed the tea which was put in front of him. Draco settled down next to him, looking around disgusted by the state of the hut. He clearly was used to better surroundings.

In the cauldron the egg started shaking.

"What on earth?!" Draco exclaimed as Hagrid put on oven gloves and got the egg out. "What is going on?"

"Ya have to promise me somethin'," the groundskeeper whispered placing the egg gently on the table top. "Ya can't tell nobody about this, okay?"

"What _is_ this?" Harry asked not daring to drink anything of the tea just yet in case he'd burn himself. "It's quite too large to be a chicken, but not large enough to be an ostrich egg."

"Ya'll see," Hagrid said mysteriously. "You came at the right time you did."

"Right time for what?!"

"Ya'll see Malfoy, ya'll see." Hagrid sat down at the table, his face only millimeters away from the egg. He looked at it with anticipation. Then it started cracking.

* * *

"Harry!" Draco exlcaimed hurrying after Harry through the snow. "A promise is a promise, even if I gave it to fatso!"

Harry stood still and glared at Malfoy. "Having a dragon in a school is bad enough, but Hagrid is unauthorised to keep it! We have to tell someone before the creature gets out of hand! If I'm not mistaken it was a Norwegian Ridgeback, a dragon with venomous fangs, and once it's big enough it will start eating large mammals and if someone is unlucky they might get eaten. Furthermore, where the _hell _would Hagrid keep that thing?"

Draco, who was secretly fascinated by the dragon, said, "Harry, you do realize if you tell Hagrid might get kicked out for illegally having that dragon?"

"Yeah but -"

"What is more important to you, the safety of your fellow students or your friend?"

* * *

That afternoon as Harry went to his Occlumency lesson he longed to tell Severus about the dragon, but at the same time he didn't want Hagrid to get into trouble.

"Afternoon, Potter," Severus greeted Harry as he entered the office. He was sitting at his desk and gestured the boy to sit down in front of it.

"Thank you for the present," Harry said instantly settling down in one of the chairs.

"I thought you would find it useful," Snape shrugged.

Harry almost asked if it hadn't cost too much, but then he remembered that apparently Snape had been the only one who had betted on him, so ihe must have received an aweful lot of money. He'd probably spent some of that on the Pensieve.

In this lesson Severus took a different approach. Instead of attacking Harry and hoping the boy would be able to guard his mind, he told Harry to relax completely and start meditating. Once the boy was shut off it was easier for him to keep it shut from Snape. By the end of the lesson Harry was able to shut Severus out while meditating, and the next time Severus was planning to do everything without meditating as when the Dark Lord would attack Harry wouldn't have the time to start meditating. He had to start learning to use occlumency without really concentrating on it.

Following the end of the lesson Harry met up with Draco to help him with all the homework he had to do. In the evening the Slytherin Quidditch team went for practice. As it was cold they had the advantage of the other teams not practicing which gave them an advantage. Flint explained to the whole team the information Harry had obatined, and then he went on to describing the attack and defence tactics Hufflepuff used. After that they went on to the actual training. By the end of it they were half knocked out by the energy they had used and by the coldness of the evening.

On the way back to the castle Harry paid Hagrid a quick visit, asking about the dragon's health.

"Norbert's quite alright he is!" Hagrid laughed. "Wanna come in?"

Harry shook his head. "I've got classes tomorrow, I need my sleep." He continued his way back to the school, still thinking it would be better if he told Snape about the dragon which Hagrid had obviously called Norbert.


	10. Quidditch

****

**Existe****nce**

**Chapter 10: Quidditch**

No sooner than the announcements of the first Quidditch game was made - Hagrid had been right with saying that Slytherin would play against Hufflepuff - Hufflepuff suddenly started booking the pitch at all possible times. Although the Slytherins weren't quite happy with that they knew that they have had a couple of weeks practice more than their opponent and were a little bit less worried.

Harry visited Hagrid at every chance he got to see how the dragon was. Within three weeks it had doubled in size, much to Harry's disliking. Furthermore it had started breathing fire. The groundskeeper's beard had been in flames on numerous occasions.

"I _really _think you should give Norbert away," Harry told his friend on his visit four days before the first game.

"Harry, I can't! I'm his mummy, ya need to understand!" Hagrid disagreed urgently placing a cup of tea and a plate with hard biscuits on the table in front of him. "Without me li'l Norbert here would be totally useless."

"Yeah, but what about the health and safety of the students? What will happen if Norbert frees himself and starts attacking the castle?" Harry argued taking a careful bite from one of the cookies. _Urgh! _Had a part of his tooth just broken off?!

"Why, Norbert would never do such a silly thing, would ya Norbert?" In reply the dragon baby spat a fireball at his "Mummy". "And anyways Harry, where would young Norbert go? I can't just leave him alone in the forest, can I? A mother never abandons her child!"

A mother never abandons her child. If only it was true.

Harry shook his head to clear his thoughts. No - he couldn't think about her now. "No, not the forest," he continued speaking. "That's too near - we need something far far away."

Hagrid crinkled his nose. "Ain't Ronald Weasly got a brother working with dragons?" he said thoughtfully.

"I can ask him," Harry suggested. He stood up and took his broom which had been leaning against the table. "I've got Quidditch practice in ten minutes, I'd better get changed otherwise Marcus will make a fuss."

"See ya around Harry!" Hagrid yelled after him as he exited the hut while trying to keep Norbert under control.

It was still cold, but at least the snow had disappeared totally. The last phases of winter would be over in about three weeks or so, and then everything would be ready for spring and for warmth.

Hufflepuff would by far not be a strong opponent, but Flint had already voiced his worries about Gryffindor. This year, instead of going after talent, Wood had gone after strength. The beaters, chasers and keeper were the stockiest boys from Gryffindor while the seeker was the smallest yet strongest girl. It was a strong team, and even with Harry's extreme talent it would be hard for them to wind if they didn't manage to knock half the team out.

"Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw will be easy to beat," Flint said before they started training. "But we can't get light headed thinking we're going to beat Gryffindor like we have in the last couple of years. It will be hard; Wood has assembled the strongest players in his house while we have talented."

"You saying we're not stong?" Lucian barked. "We can beat them no matter how many player they have!"

"That's what I'm talking about!" Marcus exlcaimed furiously. "With this attitude we're going to _lose_. We have to make them think we're not as good as them to get them to be light headed. It's quite easy to do that. All we have to do is to cut our wins as close as possible. Meaning we have to give Hufflepuff a hundred points more than we have, and then we need to trust Harry to catch the snitch in time. The same with Ravenclaw, only we need to cut it even closer. It'll make the Gryffindor's believe we're losers and that we'll never win against them. Then _bang!_ and we win the cup for yet another year!"

"That's risky," Harry stated. "What if I don't manage to catch the snitch in time?"

"Then, Harry, you will have to face a mob of angry students."

This was their second last practice before the came as Hufflepuff had booked the pitch for the next three-and-a-half days, only giving them some time on the evening before the game. They did the best they could, flying and training the moves they'd taught themselves dozens of times until they couldn't sit on their brooms any longer.

The next days dragged themselves by like nothing before. Harry was quite cool about having his first game in only 72 hurs, but the night before as he went to bed he found it extremely hard to start meditating. He couldn't help but wonder what would happen if he messed up.

At breakfast he was surprised to find a mug of coffee appearing in front of him rather than the normal orange juice. With a glance at the headtable his suspiciouns were confirmed that Snape had known that he would need it.

"You need to eat," Draco said shovelling food onto Harry's pile.

"I'm not hunrgy," Harry objected. After drinking the coffee he wasn't in the mood to eat anything.

"You need the energy," Draco insisted. He watched Harry reluctantly start eating.

"See you after you lost against the worst team!" Wood roared as he walked past the table to exit the hall.

Flint sat down next to Harry. "Don't listen to him, JP. We'll win. Just do what I told you."

An hour later the Hufflepuff and Slytherin team was getting ready for the game. In the changing rooms Harry threw up all his breakfast. Severus quickly came in to wish them good luck, giving Harry a potion to calm his stomach down.

"Don't worry kiddo," Flint said as they were waiting to go out. "I nearly fainted before my first game. Also, I was hit in the jaw by a bludger. Broke it, smashed half my teeth and left the others crooked. Pomfrey took me to a muggle teeth doctor or sort of fixed everything."

"Very calming," Harry breathed paling evidently. "_Very _calming."

Marcus shook his head. "Don't listen to me JP. I'm one of the worst players in the team, the only reason I became Quidditch captain is because my father did a favour for Snape. After that accident I didn't want to play any more, but it's family tradition for me to play as chaser so I had to continue. JP, Quidditch is a gruel sport. Only play as long as you have to and then quit. You might find it entertaining now, but as soon as you joined a professional Quidditch team you'll get injuries every other week, especially you as a seeker. Proper games are painful. You ever watched one?"

Harry shook his head.

"I have. Last summer. Half the players were shipped off to St. Mungus afterwards. Stayed for a week to get their energy back and went back to training even if their wounds hadn't completely healed. You're quite unfortunate. You've got seven years to play, I joined when I was fourth year. This is my second year playing, and it takes a lot of strength to get up every morning after a thorough practice, and even more to go back on that pitch week after week."

"We're up," Graham said grimly. Everyone grabbed their broom.

"Good luck, guys," Marcus announced. "Miles, you know what you've gotta do. Ten goals. Then hopefully Harry will catch the snitch and rescue us from further time playing."

Harry nodded.

They stepped outside, mounted their brooms and listened to loud _boes_, only a faint _yay!_ coming from the Slytherin part of the crowd. As Hufflepuff's team came out into the sun shine it was the other way around.

"Don't be nervous," Marcus said flrying by Harry. "The balls will be released in a moment. Make some half-hearted grabs but don't do anything until they're a hundred points ahead of us."

Harry nodded.

Hooch whistled. She released the balls and the crowd cheered.

"What the hell?" Draco gasped as the Hufflepuff chasers grabbed the quaffel without Marcus doing much to defend it. "What are they doing"?"

"They must have some plan," Blaise said worriedly. "I have never expected them to be _this _bad."

The game dragged on. The Slytherins were doing the worst job anyone could do. Everyone laughed at them, even their own house. The teachers grew worried.

"Hufflepuff 100 points!" Lee Jordan who was counting the points and reviewing on what was happening reported. "Is Slytherin ever going to get back on their feet from this long fall? The answer is this: the snitch! If Potter manages to catch the golden devil Slytherin _will _win!"

Harry grinned. Now it was time to get into action. He took a sharp left turn, cutting off the Hufflepuff seeker. A bludger raced above his head narrowly missing his head. The quaffel was passed right in front of him. He saw the snitch near the ground.

The crowd gasped as he went into a steep dive, but because the snitch decided to disappear he had to pull out again. The crowd calmed down as Harry gained height again.

He was frustrated. Hufflepuff was now 110 points ahead of them, and if Slytherin didn't start scoring points then even if Harry did catch the snitch there was still a chance they won't win. Where on earth did that snitch go?

His broom started jerking from side to side so suddenly that Harry nearly fell off, holding on tightly to the stick in the last second. What was happening? His Nimbus 2000 was out of control, but how was it possible? It took him all his strength to just hold on let alone stay on it. An instant later he was hanging in the air, one hand gripped around the wood while he was dangeling there not able to do anything. He started to panick.

The crowd was irritated and anxious. Everyone including the players forgot about the game, watching Harry with horror as he struggled not to fall down.

"What is Snape doing?" Ron hissed into Hermione's ear pointing at the potions master. "I think he's cursing Harry!"

"Wait here," Hermione instructed setting off. "And watch Harry!" As soon as she disappeared Harry lost his grip and fell to his sure death.

Dumbledore managed to soften his fall by slowing him down with a quick spell. Harry hit the ground, breaking his leg. However, as he opened his palm the golden snitch lay inside it. Slytherin had won with fourty points more than Hufflepuff.


	11. Monumentum

****

**Existe****nce**

**Chapter 11: Monumentum**

"You done with your homework?" Draco questioned looking at Harry who had been in the hospital wing for two days.

"Why can't you do it for yourself for once?" Harry moaned. "You should leave me a day to relax, really."

"I can't help being lazy can I?" Draco laughed. "Anyways, I've gone to see Hagrid again. Norbert's really grown."

Harry grabbed one of the chocolate frogs the Quidditch team had brought him from the bedside table. "Does Dumbledore know about him?"

Draco shook his head. "Hagrid told me he won the egg in a card game, the old coot knows nothing. However, a wizard promise is greater than a muggle promise. There is no way you can break it. If you do and people find out they'll never ever believe you again."

"But -"

"Wizard promise," Draco reminded him. Then he sighed. "Hagrid is your friend, isn't he? If information about his illegal dragon comes out he'll be fired. Do you want that to happen?"

"Mr. Malfoy," Madam Pomfrey said waddling over. "You have to go now."

Draco rolled his eyes as he collected all the books. "See you tomorrow," he said to Harry as he exited the hospital wing. Soon after he left Madam Pomfrey gave Harry a sleeping potion so that he could get to sleep early.

**Why hello Harry. You had a rough couple of days hadn't you?**

_Hat! I haven't heard from you in ages._

**Yes, I thought I'd give you some time to relax. Up for the next question?**

* * *

Harry was glad when he could go back to lessons. Pomfrey mothering over him all the time was too much for him. The first person he met after coming out of the hospital wing was Hermione.

"Harry," she said warmly relieved to see him. "I want to show you something. It took me a while to figure out what you and the rest of your team was planning, but as soon as you became active after Hufflepuff scored a hundred points it became clear. While I looked around the trophy room I found something which might interest you."

Interested Harry followed her. He had never been to the trophy room.

"Over here," Hermione said leading him through the glass cases filled with all sorts of trophies ranging from small dainty ones to massive objects. They stood still in front of a group of medals.

"There. James Potter seeker for Gryffindor."

"You mean I inherited my talent from my father?" Harry asked shocked. He had never known anything about eithe of his parents, and this came as a surprise.

Hermione nodded. "Seems so at least."

Without saying a further word Harry left the room.

* * *

"Watch where you are going, Potter," Snape snarled looking down at the boy. An instant ago he had been on his way up to the ground floor when Potter had walked into him on his way down to the dungeons. Only when he looked at the boy's face did he calm down a little.

"Harry," Severus said sitting down next to him. "What's up?"

Harry looked up at his Head of House. "Why was I never told about my parents? Why was it kept from me that my father was a great Quidditch player?"

Severus sighed. "Come with me," he ordered standing up. Reluctantly Harry followed.

They walked to Snape's office where Harry sat down on a chair.

Severus sighed again. He went to a cupboard, unlocked it and took out a small box. Then he took several phials and extracted some of his memories. "Here," he said giving all of it to Harry. "You should watch this before you form an opinion."

Once back in his dorm Harry locked the door and started watching the memories after he'd put them in the Pensieve.

_He was staring right at a door. Hearing voices behind him he slowly turned around, not sure what to expect. In front of him was a bed with a woman in, red hair and sweating all over. She looked sleepy. Next to her were two young men, one of which Harry recognized to be a younger version of his own Head of House. The other was was quite roughed up._

_"Let me hold him!" twenty-year-old Severus wailed._

_"You'll get your turn," the other man laughed. He gave a bundle to Snape. Harry stepped closer to see what it was: a baby, staring curiously at Severus. It reached out to grab a handful of his long hair. He laughed at he carefully freed it again._

_Severus looked at the woman. "Decided what you'll call him yet Lily?"_

_Lily?! Did that mean she was- and the baby was- _

_"Harry James," the woman whispered, taking baby Harry again. "Isn't he beautiful?" She looked dreamily at her son._

_"Just a pity that his father can't be here," the second man remarked coldly._

_Severus elbowed him hard. "We talked about this Lupin," he hissed furiously. Then he sat down on the bed. "It's okay Lily, I'm sure Potter is drinking his head off because he's so happy."_

_"Hardly," Lupin said icily. "You should know James by now-"_

_"Why can't you just shut up for once, Remus Lupin?" Severus sneered angrily looking at him. "Lily just gave birth an hour ago and you can't do anything except go on about her husband who didn't even send a message to explain why he's late!"_

_"It's okay Sev, really," Lily said swallowing. It was obvious that she was sad._

_Harry didn't understand anything. Why hadn't James been at his birth? Why had only been Snape and that Lupin guy there? Where was his father? And what had Snape meant with "drinking his head off because he's so happy"?_

_Severus stood up from the bed and went over to Remus Lupin, pressing a bottle into the man's hand. "Here, now go. The rest will come with an owl."_

_"You know the owl won't return, right?" Remus said drily._

_"I'll send a big fat one so that you can enjoy your meal," Severus joked. After Lupin had gone he sat back down next to Lily. Harry did the same, watching his Head of House take baby Harry _

_"I'll always love you no matter what," he whispered._

_"Are you talking to me or Harry?" Lily asked smiling warmly. _

_Severus laughed. "You if you are selfish, Harry if you are loving, both if you think I'm loving."_

_Lily laughed. "No matter how much James drinks, he's Harry's father and I'll stay with him. I know you want me to come back to you Sev." _

_"_Say you want to go back to him_," Harry suddenly said. "_Say it!" _He so much wanted that his mother chose to live with Severus again. However, he knew she wouldn't. After all she only died because she refused Snape._

_The scene changed as soon as the door opened and two drunken men stumbled in, one of which singing loudly. _

_"Yo Lily! Had a baby alright?"_

_"Potter," Harry heard Severus' voice as everything went blurry._

_Next he found himself in a kitchen of some sort. The TV from the living room could be heard. He saw his mother, Lupin, Severus and himself now a little bit older, sitting on Lily's lap._

_"Has he started speaking yet?" Severus asked._

_Lily shook her head. "Not yet."_

_"Probably will some time soon," Remus said._

_"Don't rush him," Lily begged. "I don't care if it takes him a hundred years to say his first word, I'll always love him no matter what." She started cuddling little Harry._

_"HEY! Can we get a beer 'round here?" an unfamiliar voice suddenly erupted._

_Harry started crying. Lily attempted to calm him down while Remus stood up, opened the refrigerator and got out two bottles of beer. Then he disappeared into where Harry guessed was the living room._

_"Don't you have a pacifier?" Severus asked concerned._

_"I've not had time to buy new ones yet," Lily said annoyed. "James looses them all the time."_

_"Come here," Severus said taking young Harry from her. He moved his thump towards the baby's mouth and a second later baby Harry started sucking on it._

_Lily smiled, standing up to put the empty tea cups into the sink. "You're a life saver. I'd never have been able to calm him down Sev."_

_Once calm again Harry let go off Severus' thump. He looked at the man's face._

_"Ev!" he gurgled and older Harry laughed out loud as his baby self repeated. "Ev! Ev! Ev!"_

_"Is this his first word?" Severus laughed. "Ev?"_

_The memory ended._

_This time Harry found himself in what seemed to be the living room. Again there was his mother and the other two men._

_"Well I've got to go," Severus announced standing up. He hugged Harry a last time and he replied with, "Bye bye Sev!"_

_"When is his birthday party?" Remus suddenly asked. "His birthday is next week, so you'll have it on the thirty-first?"_

_Lily nodded. Then she laughed. "I can't believe he's a year old already! Still feels like I was in labour only yesterday."_

_"Don't remind me," Severus grimaced. "It's unbelievable you didn't break my hand back then."_

_"Oh come on," Lily laughed smacking him around the head as she followed him out to the front door. Harry hurried after them."You'll be coming to the birthday party?"_

_Severus gave her a sad look. "I arranged a meeting with Lucius in three days. If he marks me a Death Eater I won't be able to visit you again."_

_"Why didn't you tell me earlier?" Lily asked him accusingly._

_"I didn't want our possibly last meeting to be depressing," Severus explained._

_Lily gave him a ruefull smile. "Looking out for me like always, eh?"_

_"I will never stop to do so," Snape said smiling warmly. _

_Knowing he still loved her as much as the first time they had met or even more than he had then she granted him one kiss. It came as a surprise, as did the aprubt ending._

_"James might have a hangover," she whispered into his ear, "but it doesn't mean he can't spy on us."_

_Severus nodded. He didn't say anything as Lily closed the door, shutting him out for god knows how long._

_She took a moment to calm down. Then she went back to the living room. Harry stayed for some seconds later, trying to digest the last meeting between his mother and his Head of House. When he returned to the living room he was just in time to see baby Harry take his first step. Once again his father had not been there._

_Things went blurry._

_Balloons. Presents. Banners. Birthday cake. It was his first birthday. Looking around he saw the whole Weasly clan, Mrs. Weasly highly pregnant. Lupin talked with another man with black curly hair. Harry's baby version was held by his mother who talked with another woman. Where was James? __It took Harry some moments to see him (he was sober for once) and Dumbledore in a corner. All he could see was James giving the headmaster fabric which looked quite familiar._

_Seconds later things went blurry again. The living room appeared. James sat in front of the TV with a beer bottle in his hand. Lily sat next to him with young Harry on her lap._

_"I'm thinking of going to my sister's over Halloween with Harry," Lily said while breastfeeding her son._

_"Nah," James said while opening a new beer bottle. "You'll stay here with him. It's his first year, how about you go next time?"_

_"Okay James," Lily said quietly buttoning her shirt up._

_Harry was so angry. He realized that if James had let them only he would have died and his mother would have survived, gone to live with Severus and he himself would never have been branded the Boy-Who-Lived and been given the order to kill Voldemort._

_The bell rang._

_"Lily darling, can you go open it?" James asked burping._

_Disgustedly Lily went to open the front door. It was Sirius._

_"Hey ol' witch!" Sirius sang. He was already drunk. "Hic! James in?"_

_Lily nodded opening the door. After Sirius Remus trialed in, giving her an apologetic look._

_"I tried to stop him," he said._

_She shook her head. "Better I'll get used to it. Football season is about to start."_

_"How's Harry?" Remus asked taking his coat off. "Well I hope."_

_"Yeah. I was actually thinking about going to my sister's over Halloween, but James said it'd be better if I stay here."_

_Remus gave her a hard look. "I talked with Severus," he admitted. "He misses you and I know you miss him too. Why don't you go and live with him? He'll take proper care of you and Harry."_

_"Remus, I thank you for your efforts but I want Harry growing up knowing his father," Lily answered. "But thanks."_

_Lupin sighed. "Dumbledore said you'll be going into hiding in three days. Sure you don't want to go to Hogwarts and stay with Severus?"_

_She nodded. "I am sure."_

For a moment things went black, and Harry was scared that he had broken the Pensieve just as a new setting was formed. Then he understood: his mother's memories had ended and Sape's memories had started.

_Lily sat on a chair in the potions classroom. Severus stood at the board writing on it._

_"Sev," she said softly._

_"Yeah," he said without turning around. "What's the matter?"_

_"Do you think it'll be a girl?"_

_Taking a better look at his mother Harry saw that she was pregnant._

_Severus looked at her. "If you want it to be it'll be one."_

_She shook her head. "I want it to be a boy, and I want him just like you Sev."_

_Snape smiled. "You can still leave James. I'll make sure you and your child will have the best life you could dream of."_

_Lily stood up and walked over to him. "You're sweet you know?" She kissed him. Then she sighed. "If only James hadn't gotten me drunk."_

_"Just because you carry his child it doesn't mean you have to live with him," he told her quietly putting his hands on her hips. "And I'll love your child no matter if it should be the Dark Lord's one."_

_She laughed giving him another kiss on the lips._

_"Did I ever tell you I adore your love?" Severus asked with raised eyebrows._

_"Only about a gazillion times," she smiled putting her arms around his neck. She looked into his eyes. "I'll love you no matter what Sev, you know that? Just because I live with James and have his child it doesn't mean I can't love you. I'm only doing it for my daughter or son anyways."_

_"If you want your child to have a good future you should leave Potter," Severus adviced her giving her a final kiss. "My class will be coming in a minute or two, you can wait in my quarters if you want to. They'll be doing written work so I don't have to supervise them all of the lesson."_

_She shook her head. "James will want his lunch. Well, see you in a couple of days Sev." Lily went to Severus' quarters to use the floor system in there. Harry couldn't help but reach out to her, not wanting her to leave. He had a feeling this was the last memory in which she would appear._

_"Mum," he whispered, tears building up in his eyes. "Mum..."_

_Harry closed his eyes. When he opened them again he saw Remus standing in front of Severus, still in the classroom. He guessed a year or so had passed._

_"Lily has to get away from Potter," Severus said._

_"I know," Remus replied going through his hair in a stressed manner. "It'll only be days until James will start physically abusing her."_

_"Don't even say that," Snape snapped. "We've got to hope for the best."_

_"Hoping is not going to change anything," Remus said persistantly. "What about Dumbledore? Shouldn't he do something?"_

_Severus shook his head. "Even after all these years Potter is still his star pupil. We need to put this into our own hands, Remus. Last week Lily came here crying. You know how she is, she never cries no matter what unless she is absolutely upset."_

_"She told you what happened?" Lupin asked partially curious partially not even wanting to hear any further information._

_Severus looked at him. "Potter literally raped her."_

_Once again everything went blurry. Harry had enough; he didn't want to witness anything else but once the next one started he had to finish watching._

_Dumbledore sat at his desk while Severus, slightly older than the time before, sat opposite him. His muscles were tensed all over._

_"Headmaster," he said weakly. "You didn't call me here for nothing did you?"_

_Albus gave him a hard look. "Severus," he started._

_"They're dead aren't they?" Severus exploded standing up. "Am I right or not?"_

_The headmaster looked away. Silently._

_Harry had never before seen an adult cry, and it came a bit as a surprise as tears slowly started trickering down Severus' pale cheeks. He hit the table with his fist in an explosion of anger._

_"WHY? Why couldn't you protect them better?"_

_"Severus, you know very well- "_

_"No I don't! All I know is that both Lily and Harry are dead!"_

_"Harry isn't dead." For the first time since Severus had started crying the headmaster looked at him._

_Severus looked irritated. "What?" he breathed. "Harry's alive?"_

_Albus nodded. "Voldemort marked him as the Boy-Who-Lived. The prophecy is becoming true, Severus."_

_"DAMN THAT PROPHECY! WHERE IS HARRY?"_

_"Harry is going to live with his only relatives, Lily's sister and her husband and her son."_

_"No," Severus howled slumping down in his chair. "No.... no.... no....! Not Petunia... Albus, you have to let me look after Harry!"_

_"No," Dumbledore said immediately. "Harry is to grow up away from this world and away from his fame. He will forever be remembered as the boy who defeated Voldemort, as the first person to ever live through the death curse. He cannot grow up here."_

_"I'll move into the muggle world until he is old enough to go to school here," Severus begged. "I'll do anything!"_

_Albus shook his head. "I placed a spell upon the Dursley's house. It will protect Harry until he is either of age or until he stops calling that house his home."_

_"No..." Severus continued to wail. "NO!"_

_Everything faded out, Snape's helpless shouts still ringing in Harry's ears as they became quieter and quieter._

He didn't realise he was back at his dorm until he heard a continues knocking on the window above his bed. He opened it, letting a small bird in. He took the parchment attached to its leg.

**Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. S.S.**

_How did he know what I thought?_ Harry wondered as he put the pensieve away and lay down on his bed. He was tired.

* * *

A/N: Griffin Raven: I hope this answers all your questions (if you or anyone else has any more, tell me).


	12. Bovis

****

**Existe****nce**

**Chapter 12: Bovis**

From the next time onwards whenever he saw Wood and his companions Harry was bullied relentlessly by them. He was sure that this was their newest plan to make him feel bad and that he would thus perform worse in Quidditch. They too must have realized what Slytherin was planning. If not they were just as stupid as they looked.

Determined to find out why Fluffy was in the building he visited Hagrid over and over again. While the groundskeeper wouldn't say anything about the dog, Harry watched worriedly as the dragon grew and grew.

"You can't keep him here forever," Harry told him in the middle of March. They were sitting at the table having tea. Another Quidditch game had been the day before; Gryffindor had won against Ravenclaw.

"Why not? He ain't doing nothin' to the children," Hagrid said while feeding Norbert who by now was twice the size he had been when he'd escaped the shell.

"Maybe not now, but he will be before long," Harry prophecied. He watched the dragon struggle to swallow an extremely big chunk of dead mouse. "I reckon you should get rid of him sooner than later."

"Get rid of him?" the groundskeeper cried starting to cuddle with Norbert who set his beard on fire. "I ain't gonna get rid of the little thing! He'd never hurt a mouse, Harry."

"He just ate one," Potter pointed out. He sighed. This wouldn't go anywhere. Promise or no promise, he had to tell Severus. Maybe not the whole truth, but at least an overview of how things were.

Outside the sun was shining bright. Harry took his time to get back to the castle, wanting to enjoy the first warm day of the year. He didn't notice the Gryffindor boys.

"There is that little piece of shit!" Wood roared as he and two other boys barged towards him. Seconds later they got Harry pinned on the floor.

"W-what do you want?" Harry stammered frightened. Never before had they lain a hand on him.

A fist dug into his cheek, narrowly missing his left eye.

"Next Quidditch match," Wood said. He was standing next to the boys who were holding Harry on the ground, looking down at Potter in disgust. "You'd better lose or else."

An instant later all three had disappeared into some nearby bushes. Harry didn't have the strength to go after them; his cheek was throbbing with pain.

Inside the castle it was nice and cool. The pain ceased a little as he descendet into the dungeons. For a moment he stood there pressing his cheek against the stone, sighing in relief as it stopped to hurt so bad.

Hardly anyone was inside the common room. Most students had gone to get an early lunch.

"You okay?" Flint who sat next to one of the fireplaces asked worriedly as he saw Harry. "You don't look too good."

"I'm fine, really," Harry insisted climbing up the stairs to the boys' dormitories. After making sure no one was anywhere near the First Year's dormitory he pulled the Pensieve out from under his bed and in order not to think about it for the next couple of hours he placed the memory into the bowl, then going to bed. He fell asleep instantly.

* * *

"Ah, Arthur," Albus greeted cherrily as a tall, plump red-haired man entered the headmaster's office.

"Albus," the man nodded sitting down. He declined the lemon drop he was offered.

"Are you here about your sons Arthur?" Dumbledore questioned. "Percy is perfect, like always. Well, you know how Fred and George are and I do believe that Ronald has already gotten used to Hogwarts."

Arthur Weasly shook his head. "I'm not here about the boys."

"Ginevra then?"

Again he shook his head. Albus raised his eyebrows popping a lemon drop into his mouth. He sucked on it thoughtfully.

"Did Molly send you?" he finally asked.

Mr. Weasly nodded. "Yes. She wanted me to talk about Harry Potter."

"Harry?"

"You know how she always thought living in the muggle world isn't the safest place in the world for him," Arthur said hastily. "She wanted to ask again if we could take him in until a proper home is found for him."

"Living with his only relatives left is what I call proper," Albus replied sulkily.

"They are muggles," the red-head said annoyed. "They can't help Harry with his homework for school, they can't help him control his magical abilities. They can't do any of the stuff Molly and I could do."

Albus thought for a moment. "Why you? Why not the Malfoys for example? Or the Diggorys? Or the Changs?"

Arthur cleared his throat. "I am well aware that Harry wasn't sorted into Gryffindor and instead into Slytherin, but he comes from a Gryffindor background so I support Molly's idea fully that he should get to know what it means to be a real Gryffindor. He has the right to know what it is like to feel the pride and courage of a lion rather than just the slyness of snakes."

"How do you know that Harry wants that?"

Mr. Weasly gave the headmaster an irritated glance. "Albus, really! Gryffindor is _the_ house to build character. Do you want our future Saviour of the World to have a good character or not?"

Albus looked at Arthur. "Very well then. I'll see what I can do."

"Thank you," Arthur answered standing up. "I expect I'll be seeing you in the Burrow in some days?"

* * *

In the afternoon Harry woke up. The first thing he saw was Draco's face only centimeters away from his.

"What's that for a bruise?" Draco breathed. He moved his head further away to allow Harry to sit up.

"It's nothing," Harry waved the matter off. "I ran into a wall, that's all."

Draco rolled his eyes in annoyance. "I ran into a wall," he copied Harry in a high-pitched vocie. "Come on. That's the oldest excuse in the book! You need to bring something better to convince me."

Harry shrugged. He threw the duvet away and put his feet onto the floor.

"I think you should see Madam Pomfrey," Draco suggested following Harry into the bathroom. "It really does look ugly." He crinkled his nose in disgust.

Lazily Harry inspected the bruise quickly, touching it softly only to find that it hurt like hell.

"Should be gone in some days," he said shrugging carelessly.

Draco sighed in frustration. "Something's not right," he said.

"What do you mean?" Harry continued to examine the bruise carefully, trying out how much pressure he could apply until it started hurting. A slight brush was too much.

"Your bruise," Draco explained. If you had walked into a wall it would hardly be on your cheek. Rather it'd be found on your forehead, and your nose too. You'd have gotten quite a nose bleed if what you say is true."

Fright flickered in Harry's eyes for an instant, long enough for Malfoy to see it.

"Tell me," he demanded. "What did really happen?"

"I told you," Potter said hastily exiting the bathroom. "I ran into a wall. That's everything to it. End. Finish. Finite. Full stop. Period."

Draco went after him, seeing him run out of the dorm. "I don't believe you!" he shouted after his best friend.

After waiting several minutes he followed Harry down into the common room. He was nowhere to be seen, and the only other person not absent was Flint.

"What's up with Harry?" he asked worriedly as soon as he saw Draco on the staircase.

He shrugged. "Told me he ran into a wall and got a bruise. If you ask me that's a load of crap; someone must have beat him up. However, he won't tell me anything."

"Probably that swine Wood and his gang," Flint mused thoughtfully. "If only we had some evidence!"

Draco's mouth formed itself into a grin. "We might be in luck Flint. I'll be back in some minutes!"

Uncle Sevvie knew Legillimency, he could look into Harry's mind and find out what had happened. Why hadn't he thought of this before? Now he only had to find his godfather.

After a ten minute search it was clear that Professor Snape was neither in his quarters, office nor classroom and furthermore not in the great hall or library. That only left the school grounds, and knowing how anti-social that man was with most people he could only be in the green houses or in the Forbidden Forest - as long as he hadn't gone away on some business.

The green houses proved to be his lucky place. It took Draco some time to explain to Severus about his and Flint's suspiciouns. While cutting some plants Severus listened carefully, at the same time weighing in his head the possibilities of Draco being right or wrong.

"I'll do whatever I can," he finally promised his godson. "However, don't get your hopes up too much. Harry knows Occlumency; it might be that I won't be able to enter his mind. While that chance is pretty slim, it is still there." _Furthermore_, he continued in his head, _if Harry has placed that particular memory into the Pensieve then there's no possible way I can retrieve it unless Potter puts it back into his mind_.

* * *

Just as the flames in the fireplace inside the crammed old-fashioned living room of the Burrow changed colour Molly Weasly entered the room, carrying a pile of newly washed and folded laundry.

"Ginny darling," she said to her daughter who was sitting on the sofa reading a book as the figure of Albus Dumbledore formed itself in the flames; "can you please go and fetch your father?"

Without talking the young girl stood up, walked into the kitchen and through the back door entered the dark night to go to the shack where Arhur was.

"Evening Molly," the headmaster of Hogwarts greeted as Arthur's wife gestured him to sit down.

"It's a little bit messy," she said apologetically.

Albus laughed. "It's always, isn't it Molly?"

Molly blushed as she put the laundry down on the floor. "Tea, Albus?"

"Yes please," Dumbledore answered looking at Ginny who had returned entering the living room. "Good evening, Ms. Weasly."

Ginevra Weasly nodded in acknowledgement, listening to her mum calling from next door for her to go upstairs to bed. She disappeared upstairs.

"Evening Albus," Arthur said out of breath as he walked in from the kitchen. Molly followed with a tray laden with tea cups and biscuits.

"Evening Arthur," Albus said taking one of the cups from Molly. "It's getting warmer, isn't it?"

"I'm glad," Molly said shivering. "Winter is always so cold and depressing..."

Arthur looked at the headmaster. "And?"

Albus took a sip from the still hot tea. Although he burnt his tongue on it he didn't show it. Instead he started talking.

"I've exchanged numerous letters with various people," he started, nibbeling on a chocolate biscuit. "The Minister of Magic finally agreed to let Harry live here as of the first day of summer holidays for a trial period of six months. If everything goes well and Harry wants to continue living here, he can stay. Otherwise he will either go back to his relatives or someone else will be found, someone he would prefer to rather stay with. Additionally our beloved minister undermined that from the next school year onwards Harry should be moved into Gryffindor regardless of the sorting hat's decision to place him into Slytherin."

* * *

A/N: My laptop was down for quite a while, but now it's working again. My apologies for the long wait.


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